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27 points

LMAO did he quote “Mrs Robinson” at the end?

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7 points

He’s got his finger on the pulse

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2 points

I think it’s far from the pulse, jammed straight up his ass.

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2 points

And he should’ve finished it:

A nation turns its lonely eyes to you.

And here’s an explanation of the meaning of this part of the song:

He said, “In these days of Presidential transgressions and apologies and prime-time interviews about private sexual matters, we grieve for Joe DiMaggio and mourn the loss of his grace and dignity, his fierce sense of privacy, his fidelity to the memory of his wife and the power of his silence.”

So Trump, learn something from Simon and Garfunkel and stop being such an insufferable attention whore. We need quiet heroes like Joe DiMaggio, not whatever Trump is.

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