Google’s story over the last two decades has been a tale as old as time: enshittification for growth. The once-beloved startup—with its unofficial “Don’t Be Evil” motto—has instead become a major Internet monopolist, as a federal judge ruled on Monday, dominating the market for online search. Google is also well-known for its data-harvesting practices, for constantly killing off products, and for facilitating the rise of brain-cell-destroying YouTubers who make me Fear for Today’s Youth. (Maybe that last one is just me?)
Google’s rapid rise from “scrappy search engine with doodles” to “dystopic mega-corporation” has been remarkable in many ways, especially when you consider just how much goodwill the company squandered so quickly. Along the way, though, Google has achieved one unexpected result: In a divided America, it offers just about everyone something to hate.
Here are just a few of the players hating Google today.
Corporations: Hmm, we seem to have saturated our market. How do we make line keep go up?
- Diversify our products to cater to new or niche markets.
- Accept the status quo and focus on making our existing customers happy while integrating feedback to improve and entice people to ditch our competitors?
- Make everything worse because what are they gonna do, use Bing? LOL
- Congratulate ourselves on winning capitalism, then selling our stocks to the employees so we can go enjoy our wealth and return forever.
- HAHAHAHA yeah right. Time to squeeze this shit for every red cent then cash out before the stock price crashes and move in to the next victim.
