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61 points

Steal your vessel? What was he, a pirate? Did he have an eyepatch and a pegleg?

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5 points

Poor boat captain :(

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2 points

No he clearly means his body! A solid gold copy of his berth certificate signed at 450 degree angle sent to the general of the Duke United Merchant Bank, will quickly banishment this illegal tryannt to twatlight zone and return control of his body

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14 points

I guess you drive a car but travel in a vessel.

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9 points

These people love their magic words. Of course, they never actually work, but it’s not going to stop them from continuing to try.

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13 points

These are the people who click on ads that say “the secret health fix your doctor doesn’t want you to know about”.

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21 points

Yarr, he flew the jolly roger, he did.

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