Top screenshot and [left] transcript are real and verbatim from Sept 4 broadcast on national TV.
Well, nothing is more suggestively manly than this:
A man with tiny hands has to throw his glass of water because he can’t set it down gracefully. Fuck, it’s already been four years.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GO_BdivESOk
Edit: He’s much more coherent in this clip than in anything today.
Honestly, that’s how I’d imagine an 80 year old drinking. Removing the weave and orange tan and it looks about right.