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9 points

Fuck you, asshole. Way too little, way too late. “Sorry I intentionally crashed that plane into that skyscraper. I repent.”

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12 points
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I tend to be more pragmatic. Nobody is born wise and everyone fucks up (some more than others). For guys like this I like to take the approach of "Thank you, now what are you going to do about it? ". Repentance is good, but not enough. You have to actively work to right your wrongs. If he is truly sorry that he wronged and harmed gay people for decades, then he better be prepared to fight with all his might for the LGBTQ+ community for the rest of his life.

Some sins are so great that you will never be able to make amends, but you have to try.

EDIT: Mild rewording.

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7 points

Yeah that’s my stance. Some people do a lot of bad before doing good. We shouldn’t blindly trust but we shouldn’t disincentivize change.

Most who do harm will never do enough good to overcome it, but they can do a lot more good than they otherwise would, and they can do harm too. Tammy Faye Bakker was once not a good person, a conservative evangelical preacher and embezzler married to a rapist. When her and her husband’s lives fell apart she changed and wound up being a voice of progressive Christianity going as far as to hug a gay man with aids on television in the height of the aids crisis. She died speaking and listening to those who had been persecuted by American Christianity, and cherished by Christians among them. Her ex husband took a different path, and to this day is a bigot who sells bulk food for preppers.

We shouldn’t let the right wing be the only people who will accept those who want to repent and change. We should instead offer the option of penance and restorative justice, forgiveness that means something because it’s actually earned

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4 points

I agree with you in many cases. This goes well beyond a fuckup. Writing and publishing an entire book is not a fuckup. It’s actively pushing hatred. That does not deserve a thank you just because he apologized. Apologizing is the bare minimum and as such requires only acknowledgement.

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7 points

Agreed. The apology should be the starting line, not the finish line. This dude better become the fiercest advocate for the LGBTQ+ community if he truly wants to chip away at that karma debt before he croaks.

Also, there are always cases where there is no redeeming. I am sorry but putting a man on the moon does not cover your Nazi debt.

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6 points

Indoctrination is a very powerful force. I am glad he broke free from some of the chains and saw the error of his ways, but he has a lot of work to do to make amends, especially after being such a hateful asshole for so long, having such reach and such a voice.

Some people manage to break free and it should be celebrated and supported, because often times, especially for teens, trying to break free leads to excommunication, and becoming a pariah, and after your teens, changing becomes way, way harder.

Sincerely, a formerly indoctrinated homophobe, now an atheist, gay and fierce defender of many rights.

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1 point

No offense, but that does ring hollow for those of us raised to be horrid that didn’t drink that poison down.

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2 points

The same water that softens the potato, hardens the egg. Not all of us were raised in the same conditions, not all of us had the same factors weighting on us.

It is not about overlooking your strength, it is about having some empathy for those of us who aren’t as strong as you, yet still fought to get out of that vortex of hatred.

Trust me, it was not my intention to overlook your struggles, and I sincerely apologize.

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