because it’s scary how the school system can make the most kindhearted people form such sadistic worldviews. it gives me hope that my peers can find some sense one day.

yeah school and gender expectations honestly turned me into someone I really didn’t like for a long time. I was always really sensitive and empathetic as a kid, and I cried all the time (i was an empathy crier i literally couldnt look at people crying without crying because i felt so bad for them lol). apparently this also was a symptom of adhd I’ve since come to find out after being diagnosed as an adult a year or 2 ago. speaking of things that would have made my childhood and especially my adolescence a lot easier… of course, this got me made fun of quite a lot, and at around 12 years old after my best friend at the time attacked an insecurity of mine and made me cry i finally decided to kill the part of me that cared which really ended up blunting a lot of my empathy in general for a long time, which directly led into me becoming cruel and callous and obsessed with “funny roasts” that at times went way too over the line into bullying because if people didnt care about my feelings i wasnt going to care about theirs. also just in general led me into being a complete edgy shithead, I’m sure you know the type from school. I am glad i managed to keep enough empathy to remain anti-war and not completely racist, as pathetic as that probably sounds, mostly because I think it kept me from ever actually being in danger of falling down the alt right pipeline. it’s only been in the few years or so that I’ve felt like I’ve begun to recover my empathy, and I still am not where I used to/want to be. I’d like to be a complete sap who cries at every sad moment in a movie when my healing process is done lol, feels like that was the kind of person i should have been if not for society^TM

hope that wasn’t oversharing just wanted to give hope there really is a chance that your peers will recover.