That’s pretty smart, but I have no social life and live on the internet (have since the 90s when I hit my teens, because I changed schools every year from 5th grade on, which is no way to build stable relationships), and drinking alone… well it seems slightly better with internet company. Even if that’s detached in time. I kinda miss the chat rooms that were around when I was 13-20, but at the same time, I definitely don’t (a/s/l was nothing but pervy old dudes scoping targets…)

I don’t really think I’ll ever be sober, because I like brewing beer and have nothing to fully quit for (based on family history, I’m pretty likely to die young, so either 50s young, or 80s old no matter what shit choices I make, so I’m splitting the difference), but it’s fucking with my stomach and increasing my anxiety, so I’m def trying to moderate it. I’m down to mostly not drinking during the week… it was a lot easier to quit when I was 24 and had a drinking problem (lasted about a year after my mom died, she was the only family I had), wtf?

And thanks! It’s a reminder to be a better person and not let it grow out of control. You need to tend a tree for it to be healthy and constructive (nature does this as well, with storms and cycles and sun), I need to tend my apathy so it doesn’t overtake the beautiful, rich, and diverse garden of thoughts and feelings it tries to shade out. My mental health writ large.

My Reddit handle was related to what I used the account for (wasting time) which led people to have a 50/50 assumption I was trolling so I… reassessed myself and my goals.