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Watching the count tick closer to 200,000 deaths

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TillieNeuen [she/her]@hexbear.net
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Idk why I keep checking the covid death toll on the CDC website. I know that 200,000 deaths will be reached soon, and nothing will happen. It will make absolutely no difference, and yet I keep checking. Can anyone make sense of this?

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sappho [she/her]@hexbear.net
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So many have died and no one is mourning them. Every day our leaders loosen restrictions and downplay the severity of the virus. It’s mass death without respect and without closure. So maybe part of you wants to watch that number to see that it’s real, to see that at least one person cares - yourself.

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TillieNeuen [she/her]@hexbear.netOP
3 points

It happened today. I looked at the numbers and really let myself feel what such a massive death toll feels like. Thanks for giving me some clarity about my motivations, I think it helped me to be prepared for what I needed emotionally today.

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TillieNeuen [she/her]@hexbear.netOP
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Uh, now I’m crying, so I guess you hit the nail on the head. Seriously, thanks. It’s been bothering me–why am I doing this? But that made sense, deep down. So now I feel worse, but also better? Thanks again, I feel like I really needed an answer to this.

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