“We” aren’t on Lemmy for any one uniform reason. We aren’t even all on Lemmy, I’m on a kbin instance for example.

I, personally, understand how federation and ActivityPub operate and so I’m not surprised by this. I expected it, I accept it, it’s just the way the world works. When I say something in public I lose control over who will hear it or how long it will last, and any laws that mandate I should have that control are just a placebo or illusion in the grand scheme of things.