I’m charging you $1 for that comment. I’ll have my lawyers tally your overview and they’ll provide the total sum you owe me.

I’m all about customer care so I’m happy to extend the usual 30 day due period out to 90, but you’ll need to subscribe to the Protection Plan for that benefit, which is only $4.99 a month. But your first 100 comments are free. So, really it’s a way better option for you financially over the 24 month period the contract runs for. If you comment a lot, you might be interested in the Premium Plan.

For an extra $2.99, the Premium plan also means I’ll manage your password and post for you.

But don’t take my word for it, here’s Doja Cat…