A woman was hospitalized after a ride down Typhoon Lagoon’s tallest water slide left her with severe vaginal lacerations and internal organ damage, according to the lawsuit.

24 points

“severe vaginal lacerations and internal organ damage” sooooooo not anything even remotely like a wedgie then

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3 points

I guess “wedgie” could still be the mechanism of injury but, damn.

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-8 points

At first I thought there was a wedge on the waterslide… my damn European ass hah… but honestly. Isn’t that kind of expected from the tallest and fastest slide? You know it’s the tallest and fastest…… Why would you complain about the standing water that is there to save your ass from hitting a wall?

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4 points

Water slides can/are engineered to slow you when you get close to the end. You absolutely should not be put in a position where you could be injured.

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26 points

McGuiness’ injuries included “severe vaginal lacerations,” damage to her internal organs and a “full thickness laceration” that caused her bowel to “protrude through her abdominal wall,” her lawsuit says.

Seems fair to complain to me.

These are pretty extreme injuries and if that is a possibility from normal use then you can’t say it’s safe.

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6 points

Those injuries seem crazy for a water slide! Did the person ride one of the top edges all the way down?

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5 points

Afterward, her impact into the standing water at the bottom of the slide caused her swimsuit “to be painfully forced between her legs and for water to be violently forced inside her,” the suit states.

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6 points

G-force rated G-strings have now been added to the tech tree as a research option.

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44 points

Wow, calling it a “wedgie” seriously buries the lede.

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28 points

Sounds like the whole McDonalds coffee burn suit. If the headlines downplay the severity of what happened and make it sound like it’s just a nutjob trying to sue over a wedgie, they can get away without any PR damage.

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2 points

I admit to thinking the McDonald’s one was frivolous initially. After learning more about the case, I would have been all for a law suit even if her her injuries weren’t that serious. Their policy for coffee was shady asf.

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1 point

Maybe that’s why they put it in quotes. It’s only a figurative wedgie rather than a literal wedgie.

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11 points

Feel like you can safely just leave it at the severe injuries bit.

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