I didn’t come out until I was 26, and it went badly.
My dad sat in judgement and was very ashamed of me. He did change his mind much later but still said “I don’t like your lifestyle”.
Mum never changed and did not like it all.
Both of them are dead now, and… I don’t particularly miss them. I feel strange reading about how other people appreciate their parents.
My partner’s mum considers me her 2nd son. She’s been so accepting of me, as has her family. Same with my cousins, who my dad decided not to tell. When I did tell them after he died, they were mostly very welcoming.
Ama very rural guy who grew up with a left wing familly.
They mocked me and didn’t take me seriously. They weren’t hateful directly, but just utterly dismissive of me. When I got a boyfriend they were ultra strict but let my brother fuck his girlfriend in his room. My boyfriend wasn’t allowed on the porch and we had to have a stiff and awkward conversation next to the road.
I couldn’t walk in the same room as my dad because he’d aggressively mock me for sounding gay and being too feminine. It gave me bad insecurities and I put on a layer of fake masculinity that I now realize I ruined my youth with. I wish I could just be a femboy at 18 instead of a balding wrinkled pig in lipstick like right now.
When my future husband was suicidal and I devoted all my time to comforting him, they mocked me more. They arbitrarily grounded me from my phone and computer. So when i stole my phone and used it to communicate with my husband (and use reddit) my dad literally picked me up and threw me out of the house.
If it wasn’t for my uncle I’d have been homeless.
Writing all of that down makes me regret rebuilding my relationship with my dad now that I’m married, but I’m not going to undo that. I guess it’s better this way.
My parents were frustrated, but not boiling over when I came out as bi. I guess they thought future grandchildren weren’t out of the question yet. Then I came out as trans, and I was immediately dead to them. I’ve been reconnecting with my mom years later because she’s divorcing my dad, but I’m still being cautious about it. Life has been brighter without them around anyway.
I am a father whose child came out to me. His mother and I were proud, and very flattered that they felt safe enough to tell us. I am saddened that this isn’t the universal experience — every child deserves that.
I know it was difficult for your parents, and I respect that, but you deserve to be embraced just as you are.
It sounds like you are moving on with your life and embracing family that loves you. I think that’s wise.
I know people are reading this who are going through some things. Take care of yourself. You really do deserve it.
I came out as trans to my parents seven months ago. They’re still trying to find reasons for “why” I’m trans and want me to go to therapy to be “cured” of it. I’m consequently speaking to them less and less.
I told my mom first, and she just asked a couple questions and gave me a hug. Said she loved me, and wanted to know how she could support me. I said helping me tell my dad. She did, and he took it well for someone in his 70s. He loves me, cares for me, and supports me in every way. He’s probably the only person that messes my name up, but he has the beginnings of Alzheimer’s, so he honestly feels worse when it happens than I do. I’m lucky.
