People are making me feel crazy about fearing Covid. I heard a therapist go “I don’t want to say Covid is OVER…” (but)
cw: death
I just look them in the eye as I tell them about how I held my mother’s hand as she drown in her own liquefied lungs. This was after I threw up a few times from the hours long horror show of restraining her as she flailed around in a panicked delerium of trying to pull her breathing mask off, already too brain damaged to understand it would kill her. Until finally the staff who were devoting the precious time they could to people they could actually save, got to her with some sedatives.
She had gotten so confused in those last couple of days before the turn. My dad caught it too and was not at all with it, but not hospitalized. My mom called him and he couldn’t even register that the phone was ringing. He heard the voicemail a week after she died… She was asking for him to come see her, confused and scared, not knowing where anyone was or why she was there.
Death rattle, if you’ve been there at the end for someone you know it. Thing is, there was nothing left to “rattle”, just the last puff of air at the top of her lungs that she didn’t have the strength to hold on to, naturally flowing out into a faint groan. Her heart monitor getting weaker, stopping, a few seconds later and another set of beats that looked more like a scribble than rhythm. Another pause, another attempt at the nervous system trying to grasp for life that just isn’t there. Gone.
All because of the bullshit and lies. She was about to get the J&J vaccine because it was a normal type of vaccine, but then the brief blood clot scare that the news overhyped scared her off of it. She was begging for the vaccine shortly before the turn, but couldn’t understand that it was too late.
How do I stay sane? I work to help people in any way I can. I try to enjoy what little time I have on earth. I build things that interest me. I play with my dog. I spend time loving my partner, and with my friends. Those people are going to die, so will you, so will I, and every single person that exists or will exist. So focus on living what you’ve got, because it’s all you get and these stupid jerks and the stupid things they do and say will distract you from the shit that matters.
If my mom had died of a heart attack, I wouldn’t have people telling me heart attacks aren’t real. People will look me in the eye, and tell me she must not have died of Covid. She died before the vaccines were approved in late 2020. Got it from a coworker with anti-masking family. They all lived. Covid still isn’t real to them.
Sorry to hear that, I know it’s maddening. My mom’s sister was yelling at us to demand the doctors give her the horse paste. She believes that armageddon is going to happen before she dies too, because some old lady at her church told her it would. One of my mom’s close friends told my partner at her funeral that “she died for what she believed in” and insinuated that we were lying about her asking for the vaccine. Same breed of psychosis.
At the end of the day there’s no point trying to argue or give them any energy or thought, you can’t reason with that level of delusion. This is one of those times where living well is a radical act.
This is one of those times where living well is a radical act.
I’m sorry your family was affected like this. I’ll try to live as well as I can.
Positive tests, hospitalizations and deaths are all increasing (in the US). You’re not crazy, everyone else is in denial and avoiding sources of information that would punch holes in their bubbles.
And also viruses usually become less deadly over time because variants which kill the host infect fewer new hosts, so variants which do not kill the host become more prevalent.
I suspect that (1) people have become complacent, (2) people are blaming their symptoms on flu season and not realizing they need medical care until it’s too late, (3) people are not bothering to get the updated COVID vaccinations, and (4) COVID isn’t a regular part of the news cycle anymore, which is exacerbating 1-3.
I keep in mind that we were outrageously correct about the War on Terror, climate change, and a bunch of other stuff. I’m in my mid forties, I’m ugly and nerdy and my parents are working class, and I’m used to people dismissing my opinions for a very long time.
How do I stay sane? Hate (maybe a better word is resistance). I hate nearly all white people I meet, and all rich people. I’m not some sort of ideal communist, but I care more about the opinions of the cleaners at work than my “work colleagues”.
When I see yet another generic white dude not masking, or a posh person aggressively pushing back-to-normal, I barely register them as human. Maybe it’s harsh, but it keeps me feeling OK.
Also climate change at this point is sort of like the first volley of nukes already went off in slow motion, and even more are still being launched with no immediate end in sight while a significant portion of people are still arguing about whether nukes are real or a Chinese hoax
literally just ignore them, can’t do much else.
also helps that i think masks are pretty cute i guess?
Literally any time I get confronted for wearing a mask I just tell people (while slipping in small clearing of throat sounds) that I am currently positive for COVID, but we can’t live in fear any more so I’m just trying to infect as few people as possible while getting back to normal.
As soon as they start freaking out at you because they now are able to conceptualize a hypothetical because it involves them personally, start repeating their disingenuous questions with the same tone that insinuates that they’re a hypochondriac like “What are you so worried about? It’s way less serious now.” etc (it will 100% actually make them madder because now the hypothetical person whose safety is being dismissed is them) and once they’re pissed about it you can start shaming them for their anger and ask why the fuck they mask shame people trying to make (literally any, even if only token) effort to protect themselves and others if they’re so fucking mad about it when it personally involves them.
I bounce between that and making extremely belittling jokes about 9/11 (it helps that I’m a non American in America) only to completely dismiss their indignation and tone policing afterward by comparing the months where we losing more people per day than 9/11 because dipshits like them were too selfish to literally sit on their fucking hands and wait for the situation to slowly be brought back into control instead of making it worse, and asking why they can dismiss dozens of 9/11s and I can’t dismiss the ONE that convinced them all to go a on a 20 year mass murder spree.
So I guess tl;dr: extreme hostility.
