Rides his bicycle to all the carbrained right wing events and gets nearly flattened by the Angstpanzer Future Modern 4.0L, yelling hopelessly into the void how the jewish conspiracy of the car has made people soy

16 points

This seems like a plausible guy. He’s really into talking about “traditional means of transportation” and “Western urban design”.

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6 points

Another guy idea: War on cars cyclist who got into it by way of adoration of 80s china

Wants to reinstate the Kingdom of Bicycles, abhors everything that isn’t a PA-02 flying pigeon, thinks aluminium frames are a western plot to make people effeminate

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15 points
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One thing I’ve learned from browsing forums like MTBR and Pinkbike is that there is a surprising amount of reactionary/right-wing cyclists in the USA.

They’re the type of guys who will show up on a casual sunday group ride only to prove that they’re the fastest while screaming “Lance Armstrong did nothing wrong!!!”

Just imagine if r/BicyclingCirclejerk was completely unironic.

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Just imagine if r/BicyclingCirclejerk was completely unironic.

i thought it was?

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6 points

lmao

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8 points

One thing I’ve learned from browsing forums like MTBR and Pinkbike is that there is a surprising amount of reactionary/right-wing cyclists in the USA.

Should’ve specified like transportation cyclist or whatever probably. Yeah MTB people have fucking terrible traffic politics because they only interact through it through big cars used to ferry their mtbs to the fun park. I don’t hate the sport by any means but they’re not coming at this from like an urbanist perspective, pretty much the opposite actually

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10 points

I’ve seen fascists who don’t oppose 15 minute cities or walkable cities with public transportation. But they oppose it right now because they have to coexist with minorities lol. But it’s really funny when said fascists live in a hegemonic country/city and have the same beliefs - like bro, there are no minorities. You’re just making yourself suffer for no reason

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5 points

That’s mostly because they just can’t help themselves but gulp down corporate propaganda. Automobile companies don’t want 15 minute cities because they want to sell more cars, and oil companies don’t want them either because that means that the people who still own cars will spend less on gas. Fascist dipshits are their target audience because they are really gullible, if you tell them the libs want 15 minutes cities because those are actually fema camps or whatever, they will immediately believe it and campaign against it.

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4 points

I’m guessing they’ll never actually be for it, you just keep expanding (narrowing?) the definition of the undesired minorities

Look’it this city, it’s full of swarthy southern germans, disgusting

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7 points

Now whenever an SUV or oversize pickup truck goes past I’m going to say “achtung, ein Angstpanzer ansätze” and it’s all your fault

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5 points

Hey don’t shoot the messenger that’s a neologism from the german bicycle advocate bubble, I just thought it fitting here and also in general

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2 points

I’m telling you I love it.

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2 points

I’m german you have to be direct

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6 points

you just gotta take the whole lane bro, take space like a car

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