238 points

Covid just made us all realise we know a lot more people than we thought we did who would hide a zombie bite.

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161 points

More like we know a lot more people that would have zombie bite parties because they “trust their immune system” and simultaneously don’t believe in the zombie hoax.

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66 points

Also there are people who will intentionally smear their zombie bite juice on you because ain’t nobody gonna trample on their freedom.

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5 points

Kiss that damned zombie you coward. LIVE WITHOUT FEA—BRAAAAAAAINS

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13 points

Explains how zombie apocalypse movies happen

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6 points

Nadine isn’t a zombie, she just likes biting! Don’t you dare kink shame her!!!

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21 points

You didn’t know that already? The cute to a zombie bite is a bullet to the head and no one wants to be shot.

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17 points

And yell at you for asking if they have ever been bitten.

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6 points

This is a great comment

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3 points

Funny, I was saying this for decades about zombie bites. I was such a downer pessimist. Now after COVID hit my family has rebranded me a realist.

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117 points

I still can believe the world to rally together when it means to kill something.

The enemy must be simple though. Too complicated or invisible or something and the conspiracy nuts will take over.

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33 points

You wouldn’t be able to see the aliens. The best you would be able to do is get blurry pictures of their ships from telescopes if you’re lucky. Conspiracy nuts would do fine.

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25 points

Any civilization able to get to us, would be advanced enough that a carrier task group bombing the uncontacted people of the north sentinel islands would be a fair fight in comparison.
We would see a blur in our telescopes followed by death or whatever they want to do to us.

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9 points

You’re absolutely right. I was describing the hypothetical scenario where the aliens just want to fuck with us by blowing up the sun or something. If they wanted us dead it would be lights out before we know they were there.

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4 points

There are so many nightmare situations you can imagine.

A single missile loaded up with a highly contagious 100% fatal pathogen, use drones with infrared to pick off the remaining hermits.

Just drones. Self-replicating killing machines that know all the human tricks.

Neutrino bombs, a few million of them.

A horrible digging machine just digs and releases all that poisons stuff from under us. We all suffocate.

Sunblocker, apply for 30 years. The few remaining humans living in cannibalism around geothermal vents get nuked from orbit.

Giant space mirrors. Fry us.

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3 points

or whatever they want to do to us.

Anal probing, most likely.

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6 points

Something Something else*

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5 points

I thought the same thing. I could see the world banding (mostly) together for a fight, but not to just make life better.

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4 points

Too complicated or invisible or…

Bing bing bing!

Internal Combustion Engine? Nuclear Bomb? SCIENCE, praise be.

Invisible / long term & murky phenomena? JUST YOUR OPINION, man, I trust Facebook and WhatsApp forwards on this one.

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4 points

I still can believe the world to rally together when it means to kill something.

The pandemic was an opportunity for humanity to kill something, at least to the extent that viruses are alive.

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2 points

But a pathogen is too complicated to fight and invisible.

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2 points

Immunology is hard. Let’s go shopping.

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2 points

Do viruses bleed?

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1 point

I guess they bleed RNA instead of blood.

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4 points

On that note, I highly recommend checking out The Three Body Problem books. Without going into spoilers, this is a huge part of one of the books.

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2 points

I’m halfway through book two and I was thinking the same thing.

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1 point

That’s the book I was thinking of!

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92 points

I recently watched Utopia, British show about a super secret group putting naughty stuff in a vaccine.

Their plan hinged on every person being so afraid of a pandemic that everybody takes the vaccine. This was made pre COVID of course, because we now know that would never work.

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49 points

Sounds like right wing porn.

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15 points

it’s actually a really great conspiracy thriller. I’d fully recommend it. I’m sure right wing weirdos could read too much into it and find a message they agree with, but they do that with everything anyways.

I didn’t find it overtly political beyond money = corruption = shady people being able to get away with shady stuff

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7 points

If anything it’d probably annoy right wingers because it vocally blames humanity for environmental disaster.

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8 points

Yeah I’m sure someone who doesn’t think much could definitely watch the show and come away thinking vaccines are dangerous, but that’s not the angle it pulls. It relies on there being only one vaccine manufacturer, that everybody takes it, and that nobody outside the scheme actually tests the vaccine.

Of course in the real world multiple companies manufacture the same vaccine and they’re tested by numerous organisations, so it falls apart pretty quickly.

Still a good show though.

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2 points

It’s a do cu mentsry, honey

/S

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1 point

“Right wing” is pretty unhelpful as a description here, do you mean the Brexity types who “don’t trust experts” and wouldn’t touch a vaccine because Darren’s mum’s dog’s friend’s cleaner took one and still got ill, or the stuffy old Tories who just want things to go back to how they used to be and pay less tax on their generational wealth who will do as the government tells them?

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75 points

If we had a hostile alien invasion, thousands dead in the first wave, footage of the aliens, everything. half the GOP would still be saying it’s a hoax, and making it into an anti Liberal/anti LGBTQ rant. Part of them would straight up worship the aliens, a bunch of them would drink bleach.

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19 points

Aliens are woke

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7 points

honestly by the time they get the technology to visit planets so far away they’d probably get pretty woke

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5 points

I wouldn’t have believed you a few years ago but that pretty much happened.

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1 point

The GOP would become the “Human Power Elite” trope in “They Live.” Literally I swear to God that was a metaphor for Tim Scott and Herschel Walker. For that matter MTG and Boebert, too.

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73 points

I happen to really like District 9 for this reason

There’s no malicious plot of aliens blowing up shit or invading to colonize: nope, aliens literally just crash-landed on accident and humanity was like “stay the fuck right there, we’ll take all your shit until we figure out how to deal with exploit you”

Humanity is always its own worst-enemy

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20 points

Also, the future of Elysium (also Bloomkamp) looks more and more likely, with the 1 percent fucking off to a luxury space station in orbit and the rest of humanity living in poverty on the destroyed Earth.

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9 points

Another interesting thing about Elysium is how the AI is programmed to only recognize rich people as humans. Just like rich people think about it.

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3 points

I am still hoping for a Halo like future, with civil war in space, war against aliens, the threat of a dark and ancient threat and all of that. Or maybe just a Stellaris future with the same but more megastructures

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