156 points

>not a single balance update since the 8th century

You’re just begging AnarchyChess to correct you.

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63 points

They’re going to tell me to google something. I can feel it.

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51 points
*

You should only be Googling things en passant, and not hang around too long.

I’ll show myself out.

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2 points
*

I set a cron job to do it, now I’m free

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35 points

OK, I looked it up on Wikipedia. The bishop and queen were the last to have their moves set changed to the modern form in the 15th or 16th century. But even since then there have been some tweaks, such as the 3 move and 50 move rules for draws, and the orientation of the board. So you could maybe argue no balancing since the 16th century, and only a few bug fixes after that.

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20 points

En passant wasn’t even added until 1880.

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1 point

More of a hotfix than a balance update imo

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0 points

What’s en passant?

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12 points

Yeah, chess was really hard when the board had to be vertical. Horizontal orientation was a huge improvement to the player experience.

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24 points

Castle was put in place around the 17th century, and en passant wasn’t put into the rules until 1880. Both were balance issues being solved.

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1 point
Deleted by creator
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76 points

White is OP, known issue since 1889 and devs haven’t addressed it. Dead game

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26 points

Possible quick fix: Switch from turn-based to real time mode

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9 points

Isn’t that just 1 second bullet?

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5 points

I was thinking Kung Fu Chess

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73 points

Ah, there was a rule update just “recently” (1971). You could technically castle across the vertical board if you promoted to rook.

https://www.futilitycloset.com/2009/12/11/outside-the-box/

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42 points

Castling itself (as a single move) is a 17th century balance update. Before that it was done as separate moves. But the only reason castling became a thing was because the Queen and Bishop were buffed in the 15th century allowing them to threaten more spaces. This made it more advantageous to fortify the king’s position than to have him flee.

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26 points

O-O-O-O-O-O#

Jesus christ, lol

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16 points

The Picard Maneuver of checkmates if I’ve ever seen one

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11 points

Google en passant vertical castling

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58 points

But bots have become a big problem for this game recently.

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39 points

Funny story time:

I had someone cheat against me the other day (without me realizing it, because I don’t have the game sense to tell), then offer a draw in a clearly winning position. I guess they were trying to avoid detection, but I decided that I didn’t want their handout, declined the draw offer, and resigned.

The system immediately flagged them as cheating and refunded my elo, so I guess all’s well that ends well.

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11 points

Excellent Chad loss, my man

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4 points

What is elo?

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11 points

It’s the rating system for competitive gaming that was originally developed for chess, but has since been applied to all sorts of gaming, sports, etc. sometimes you might even hear people refer to a game’s matchmaking rating as “elo”, even it’s not called that.

Also, fun fact: it’s not an acronym, it’s a guy’s name:

https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Elo_rating_system

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17 points

I bet a bot can beat you at Counter Strike too if we made them as strong as possible like chess bots.

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4 points

“Butt bots… Sorry. But bots have become…” (Read in Ze Frank voice)

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3 points

bots and plugs yeah

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55 points
*

Not quite true. Before the ~15th century, the queen moved like the king and the pawns could only move 1 square from their starting square. These changes were made to make the game more exciting and less slow.

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29 points

Also castling and en Passant

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6 points
*

That old set excavated in Britain (Lewis Chessmen) had other pieces as well, such as the Berserker.

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