87 points

Truth is sculpting body hair was taking too much time and production couldn’t keep up with demand, so management decided to cut costs and keep it smooth.

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23 points

I feel like it might’ve been painted on for greek-style marble statues? Still unusual for paintings

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8 points
*

Men were depicted with pubes, though. See the article, too.
A female friend of mine actually did her bachelor’s thesis on body hair removal across certain cultures and time periods. Fun discussions were had.
Short version, body hair removal on both women and men has been around for a very long time and is subject to changes. Depictions of nude bodies follow somewhat different rules, though. If they are at all permissible, that is.

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65 points

You know how Roman statues were actually painted bright colors? In ancient times pubes were actually glued onto the groins of sculpted figures, unfortunately with weathering over time most of these sculptures lost their pubes

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43 points

Weird, the same thing happened to me

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20 points
*

Your merkin weathered away over time, too?

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12 points

It did, but people dig that now, so evvs

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10 points

Not Roman, Greek. The Greek sculptures were painted. Roman sculptors found the Greek marble beautiful without paint, and didn’t paint theirs.

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24 points

Wikipedia disagrees: Roman Sculpture

Most statues were actually far more lifelike and often brightly colored when originally created; the raw stone surfaces found today is due to the pigment being lost over the centuries.

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11 points

I think it was the renaissance sculptors that did that, not the romans.

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4 points

One of Ceasar’s statue was found to have pigment residues. You can find an image of how it would’ve looked like when it was painted.

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63 points

Smh

U know how hard it is to carve pubes???

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8 points
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This not famous enough sculptor did Bezos solely because he’s bad. Er bald.

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4 points

I’m so glad he did that crossover with The Slo-Mo Guys and Adam Savage, because that’s how I found the soft-spoken batshit insanity of his videos.

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1 point

I’m glad SpruceBringteen posted a link to that video, cause I had never seen any of them… and I’m a bit sold on that thar dumbshit

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1 point

There’s a mom joke in there somewhere.

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58 points

One medieval writer even went as far as to claim that if you take the hairs of a menstruating woman and bury them in the garden, a snake will grow from the earth. (If any of our dear readers try this at home, please write in to the ABC with your results).

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46 points

It’s OZ, the chances of there not being a snake in your garden are pretty low.

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2 points

I only wish I could give it multiple up votes! This made me laugh so hard

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42 points

Art doesn’t grow pubes, jeez 🙄

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11 points

Poor Arthur, forever trapped in prepubescence.

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