44 points

F-35 fighter jet. You try to resell that shit.

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12 points

I’d go bankrupt 0.00001 seconds into the maintenance cycle

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4 points

The ECU is unable to communicate with the rear RWR antenna, please contact your local Lockheed Martin dealership for service

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7 points

I’m sure China would put in a bid for one, your life wouldn’t be worth living after though you would need serious plastic surgery a new identity and even if you moved to China I’m pretty sure you would have a accident eventually.

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39 points

Plutonium.

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14 points

They found me, I don’t know how but they found me

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1 point

RUN FOR IT, MARTY!

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13 points

Atomic Basketball Supermen don’t grow themselves, bub.

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5 points

Atomic supermen with octagonal shaped bodies that suck blood

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33 points

somebody else’s kidney

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30 points
*

As a normal person with no underground connections, maybe a significantly sized diamond? I don’t even know where to begin to be able to sell it. And any stolen large diamond will definitely raise alarms if I bring it anywhere legal to sell.

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29 points

Something valuable you say…hmmm, let me think about it for a sec

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11 points

Don’t forget to rub it with lemons to make the invisible ink visible

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4 points

Hold on a minute! I’m taking my minute back

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