17 points

Huh. I’d prefer a QR code with a link to a video.

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8 points

Only if it’s at least a six minute video, in which lighting the candle doesn’t begin until at least minute four.

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6 points

Hey guys, uh, this is a video showing you how to light a candle. Lighting a candle is gonna be pretty useful if it’s dark or if you want your house smelling nice, but sometimes it can be kinda difficult, I’ve had a lot of comments asking me to make this video so I’m uh I’m gonna go ahead and show you how to light this candle. This is a candle I got from Tesco but you can get them from anywhere really…

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2 points

I just clicked to subscribe

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9 points

Hold the toothpick near its center Moisten the pointed end in your mouth Insert the toothpick into your tooth space, with the blunt end next to your gum Use a gentle in-out motion

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9 points

“It seemed to me, said Wonko the Sane, that any civilization that so far lost its head as to need to include a detailed set of instructions for use in a package of toothpicks, was no longer a civilization in which I could live and stay sane.” Douglas Adams, So Long, and Thanks for All the Fish

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0 points

You know, I never actually got taught how to use toothpicks, and I don’t have spaces between my teeth that would fit a tooth pick like you’re describing, so TIL. It’s definitely not as intuitive as “burn” though.

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1 point

Then it’s a good thing I told you how!

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1 point

I’ve never really suffered from the lack of this particular knowledge, I usually just floss to get stuff out of my teeth. But I do appreciate it, and I’ll probably end up using it at some point now that I know, so thanks 😊

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0 points

I’m not sure, maybe you’ve never eaten food before. But the toothpick is to attempt to clear out all the weird little bits that get stuck. It’s wasteful when they wrap them in plastic for sure, but it’s for the tiny scraps of cabbage and stringy human carcass that are annoying until you get to your toothbrush

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1 point

I use floss to handle that stuff. It works okay.

Maybe you’ve never eaten food before

What a weird thing to get condescending about.

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9 points

Fwiw I think these have some LEDs in them that light up different colours when they detect the candle’s lit

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12 points

What a time to be alive.

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18 points

Instructions unclear. Used my phone to light up the wick but nothing happened.

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16 points

The candle are illuminated, no?

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5 points

Got it. Illuminate to illuminate.

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4 points

Ah see what you did was blast everything with radiation. You must illustrify the target.

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