151 points

70% of the worlds surface is covered in water. None of that water is fizzy. Therefore the earth is technically flat…

I’ll be my coat, no need to send the pitchforks.

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32 points

You’re so wrong!

Only 70% of the Earth is flat.

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11 points
*

I’m on part of the remaining 30% and feel flat everyday. Explain that, mainstream media!

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11 points

If the world is round, why are my tits flat? Checkmate libtards!

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26 points

Banned for being too fun

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8 points

Good news, ocean acidification is literally the result of the ocean absorbing more CO2, and thus becoming less flat. Bad news, it’s kinda causing a shit ton of animals to die, especially coral.

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4 points

There are natural mineral springs that make water fizzy. Just saying

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4 points
*

Don’t worry. The water might be flat, but we’ve been working on carbonating the air for some time now.

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120 points

Many people who die “of old age” have an utterly miserable time of it at the end, sometimes for months or years. Medical treatment to keep a person alive when they’ve already lost their faculties irrecoverably can be incredibly cruel.

There’s a reason that longevity research focuses on prolonging healthy life, not just prolonging life processes.

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16 points

There’s no such thing as dying of old age. Just dying of something where you’re old enough where people go “yeah that tracks” instead of “oh no! so young!”.

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11 points

Movies lied to me.

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83 points

“Stranger Danger” is largely a myth as the most likely place for a child to be abused is in their own home and the most likely culprit is a trusted family member.

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22 points

That’s why I don’t trust family members that would abuse my kids.

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26 points
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I don’t trust myself with my kids either since I’m a close relative, I exclusively only entrust my kids to totally random strangers off the Internet.

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13 points

The number of transgender people that have been credibly accused of molesting children is minuscule. There are nearly 10,000 Catholic priests and church employees that have been credibly accused of child molestation. Catholic priests and Catholic church employees are more likely to assault children than school teachers (more priests etc. have been credibly accused than school teachers, and there are fa, far more school teachers than priests et al.)

And that’s not even getting into the “youth pastor that rapes teen girls” trope.

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9 points
*
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6 points

Oh no.that’s disappointing.

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1 point

Is there a bug in my app or is the comment you’re replying to just blank/empty?

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80 points

Your eyes have “immune privilege” meaning your immune system effectively does not know they exist as it would attack them and make you go blind if it did.

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38 points

Additional unfun fact, in case the implication goes by anyone; some few folks have discovered exactly how much it sucks when your immune system discovers your eyes and have, indeed, gone blind because of it :(

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20 points

Meaning, if you ever get a cut in your eye, go to the doctor, or else you’ll lose the eye.

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9 points
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My dog scratched his eye to the point of having an ulcer. Went to the emergency room ASAP 💸

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I was in the Army, and stabbed myself in the eye with so. Many. Branches. So much damage.

That was decades ago, and I’m not blind yet… what’s the point at which it becomes a danger?

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7 points

Actual penetration. When the outside touches anything inside the eye. Something poking the outside really really hard isn’t going to introduce your antibodies to the inside of the eye.

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What makes your immune system hate your eyes

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10 points

The same applies to the testicles.

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27 points

If your immune system discovers your testicles you’ll go blind? Is that what happens if you masturbate too much?

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7 points

That explains why I started going blind in high school!

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72 points

There’s tons of carbon frozen in Arctic permafrost. As the planet warms up, the ice melts, dumping more CO2 into the atmosphere and causing a runaway effect.

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25 points

Yet we can’t runaway from that problem

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16 points

Not enough profit in it

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4 points

Not enough short term profit. The long term returns are infinitely greater.

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17 points

There’s also tons of carbon dioxide dissolved in seawater. As the planet warms up, the warmer sea can hold less carbon dioxide, dumping even more CO² into the atmosphere and accelerating the runaway effect.

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