302 points

Being emotionally detached from really stupid leadership decisions is harder than it seems

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76 points

Took me a lot of years to not think it’s my company that is being run into the ground. I should not - and nowadays could not - care any less.

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20 points

my company

You mean “my responsibility”, right?

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3 points

Reading about it, it seems they are in fact all the same. Even the white haribo mice. TIL.

Yeah, in a way. As in, I don’t feel like I have any responsibility in things in the company going to shits (which I would if it were, well, my company).

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24 points

The book The Responsibility Virus helped me a lot with this. Most people are over-responsible for the choices of others, specifically ones they can’t reasonably influence, anyway.

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13 points

I found out that https://www.ribbonfarm.com/2009/10/07/the-gervais-principle-or-the-office-according-to-the-office/ explains a lot of the dysfunctions that one finds in an office / corporate environment.

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3 points

Yes. This lies among the reasons I find it easier not to blame enterprises for their dysfunctions. The unsustained growth imperative of our economic systems makes the Gervais Principle behavior the path of least resistance. Indeed, the only way to stop it seems to come down to the heroism of one key influential person who chooses differently.

This also accounts for why I stopped trying to fix enterprises and instead focus on helping the well-meaning people who otherwise would need to fend for themselves.

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21 points

That hit hard 😶

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3 points
*

I’m determined to ever only work in public, state-owned companies. I believe in a causal connection between being a private, profit-oriented business and the daily “wtf” moments, the only true measure of quality.

Edit: fixed the link.

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1 point

I’m afraid I’d be even more depressed by the wtf moments in a public organisation, but I am also considering it.

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2 points

I stopped giving a shit a long time ago. I do my best to consult and warn and if they don’t listen it’s not my problem.

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233 points

The company doesn’t care about you. The company doesn’t care about you. The company doesn’t care about you.

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125 points

My uncle spent years preaching to me about the need to be loyal to a company. I never drank the Kool-Aid. He spent 21 years working for an investment banking company in their IT department. 4 years before he was set to retire with a full pension, etc. his company was acquired by a larger bank. He lost everything except his 401k. He then spent the next 12 years working to get his time back so he’d be able to retire. He died 2 years ago and the company sent a bouquet of flowers.

THE COMPANY DOESN’T CARE ABOUT YOU!!

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27 points

How do you lose a pension? It doesn’t matter where you work or if a company gets bought.

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19 points

So the way he explained it to me was that essentially when the company was purchased all your accruals were reset and the pension was tied to years of service, which he hadn’t reached yet, then with the merger you were essentially a new employee. There was also a lot tied to retirement plans linked to corporate stocks that were basically useless after they merged. Either way, beyond working for the same company forever, his eggs were (mostly) in one basket.

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78 points

The company cares about you in the same way a beef farmer cares about his cattle.

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6 points

No, they don’t care that much

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59 points

Not even if you do valuable or efficent stuff for the company. You’re disposable.

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34 points

The company is always on the lookout for ways to replace you with somebody who will do more for less.

And in the meantime, they will squeeze you for every drop of effort they think they can get away with.

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Or less for less. I know a woman who is a manager of a dialysis clinic, as soon as she was making over 100k she started getting pushback from higher ups, having more oversight, and having her funds for extra services to patients / staff cut. It’s clear they want her out even though she has the lowest mortality in the region, because they don’t need more than beds filled (Medicaid pays) and legally required minimums to be met.

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14 points

also you might not be replaceable but your manager might be an idiot

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7 points

They refer to you as … HUMAN RESOURCES

You aren’t a person, you are an instrument the company uses to make more money for itself. If you die or can no longer work, you will be replaced by another human resource.

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5 points

I had a prof twisting himself into knots trying to argue that human resources really is a positive term because companies care about and maintain their resources

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1 point
*

The people on the top of the company don’t care, either… Even if it seems like the really like you alot.

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173 points
*

The most important traits for doing well at work (in this order):

  • clear, effective, and efficient communication
  • taking ownership of problems
  • having your boss and team members like you on a personal level
  • competence at your tasks
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44 points

I’m halfway through scrolling this long thread, and this is the first comment I’ve seen that isn’t overly cynical. It’s also correct.

I’ve been working for 38 years, and I’ve been someone who makes promotion decisions for 15 of them. The third one is helpful, not essential, but the others are super important. The people who rise to leadership positions aren’t necessarily the top technical people, they’re the ones who do those things with a good attitude.

The other thing I’d add is that they’re people who are able to see the big picture and how the details relate to it, which is part of strategic thinking.

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20 points

I was taught that my job is “to make sure all my bosses surprises are pleasant ones”. 15 years of working as an engineer and that never changed. Now I have my own business and that’s the thing I look for employees… someone I can leave on their own to do a job. It they have problems they can always ask me. If they screw up I expect them to tell me immediately and to have a plan of action to fix it and to prevent it happening again. And I never ever get cross if someone does come to me and say they screwed up. Far better that we tell the client about a problem than wait until the client finds the problem themselves.

Reading all these comments makes me realize how lucky I’ve been in my career. I’ve always had great bosses who defended me and backed me up.

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6 points

I’m not sure if the competence is really in the last place. I’d say it’s on the equal level. Great communication and ownership of the problems means little if you can’t really solve the problems.

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3 points

People have those things in spectrums, not all or nothing. You have to have at least some of all of them, but I’d argue that mediocre competency with really good communication and accountability is a better combination that really good competency with one of the others being mediocre.

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5 points

I still kinda disagree. We’re talking here about engineering role after all. I have a colleague who is a code wizard, but has kinda problem with (under)communicating. He’s still widely respected as a very good engineer, people know his communication style and adapt to it.

But if you’re a mediocre problem solver, you can’t really make up for it with communication skills. That kinda moves you into non-engineering role like PO, SM or perhaps support engineer.

But I would say this - once you reach a certain high level of competence, then the communication skills, leadership, ownership can become the real differentiating factors. But you can’t really get there without the high level of competence first.

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135 points

Your employer does not care about you. You are not important or irreplaceable

Take your time and energy and put it into your life, not their business

I have had coworkers die (not work related) and by the time you hear about it (like the next day) they have already worked out who will get the work done so the machine doesn’t have to stop

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41 points

I had a workmate develop a chronic illness after an infection of COVID, and he had to leave under hardship. People that hung out with him as best mates for years stopped talking to him in a matter of days.

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9 points

Did you? 🥺

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18 points

I sent him a few 3 message to see how he was doing. NGL we weren’t super tight before COVID, we never hung out outside of work, and people not masking around me really drove a wedge between us. I’m trying hard not to justify what happened, but who knows maybe I am a little bit.

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28 points

I don’t think taking action to fill a hole is indicative of not caring.

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18 points

I’m all for filling holes!

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2 points

Hole filling action, even!

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10 points
*

True but there’s also absolutely no reason to think they care. Even if someone dies. Because they really don’t. So it feels extra soulless when they send out the email redistributing tasks right after the generic condolences email that goes out to the whole floor

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2 points

I mean, how do you gauge how much someone cares? What would make you think someone cared (either at work or anywhere else)? I think all actions by a company would make people think it’s just an unempathetic gesture. Even if it was a small company and the employee was there for very long and was actually missed.

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8 points
*
Deleted by creator
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131 points

There is no ideal place to work where they “do it right”, whatever kind of “right” you care about right now. When you change jobs, you merely exchange one set of problems for another.

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28 points
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Having worked 7 different jobs that all were in the same field made me have some backbone of standards that nobody else could have built without going through that, though. It’s a blessing and a curse, so be warned. The things I picked up on that I never realized I would care so much about in the healthcare field is good office administration and Director of Care leadership. The morale is just as important as the pay rate.

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16 points

i worked at all the pizza chains delivering ---- the absolute shittiest ones were a nightmare, for the same 3 reasons:

  1. not letting employees make food themselves. it’s a restaurant, you have abundant food, it’s cheap, we all know it’s cheap, we work long shifts, come on. the cobbler’s son should have good shoes.

  2. overemphasis on dress code – if you genuinely give a shit if the pizza guy has his hat backwards, you should literally be sent to the gulags.

  3. being overworked for low pay, especially being made to drive when exhausted [literally dangerous and life threatening!!]

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10 points

As a consultant, I now feel grateful to the variety of dysfunctions that I experienced, because they provided me with some of the credibility that I use in advising others. That’s the blessing part.

That, and comedy equals tragedy plus distance.

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16 points

That said some companies do it more right than others. The problems at the current company are ones I can live with. Which is why I’m still there after way more years than expected.

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6 points
*

Indeed, that’s what I mean: you’re always exchanging one set of problems for another, until you find the set of problems that you can accept (enough (for now)).

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12 points

Is this still true if you’re self-employed?

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37 points

Absolutely. There is no business yet in which you invent money from nothing. Everyone works for someone else. It might be a capitalist boss, it might be a client, it might even be constituents or donors, but no one truly works for themselves. The only winning move is to not play, and the ones fortunate enough to not have to play were born rich. Being self-employed and/or owning your own business is just trading one boss for another.

Source: Was in private practice for a decade; now I’m a corporate attorney, and it’s just a different set of people making my job hard.

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5 points
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Deleted by creator
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6 points
*

I feel better about the things I do wrong, because at least I made the decisions and I can only blame myself. I can also choose which things I especially care about doing well instead of being subject to someone else’s preferences. It feels better, but still yes.

And, as CEO of a tiny company, I have to interact with bureaucracies more than I did as an employee, so becoming my own boss didn’t mean escaping that nonsense, anyway.

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