30 points

You really believe cats would stoop so low? Obviously cats made human babies evolve to sound like cats, because humans were engineered to serve cats, so by sounding like cats the little humans would be fed more to be stronger and have more humans to feed cats.

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I think you’re onto something here

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21 points

Cats can psychologically manipulate me so I take care of them, as a treat.

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4 points

Cats can psychology manipulate me I to being happy for doing shit for them. The key word there is happy. Not much else does that for me anymore. I need those dopamine hits

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21 points

Then why does my cat try to kill me by running under my feet every time I walk down the stairs? Are my treats and scritches not enough?!?!

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22 points

if you fall they get to eat you

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20 points

Because if you step on them, you’ll feel bad and then fuss over them and give them more treats. And the cat won’t be hurt because they are liquid so it’s a no-risk, all reward activity.

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It’s never enough. Never.

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19 points

Haha that’s how my sister got one of her cats. She lived next door then kind of decided she lived with my sister instead. So my sister went over and told the people their cat kept coming in her house and they were like “whatever keep her we were going to get rid of her anyways.” And now my sister has had her for like 10 years.

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13 points

Damn, that cat knew.

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13 points
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7 points

Fair trade really

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