So I work at this warehouse that salvages old technology, like when a company gets rid of stuff they send it to us and we sort out what’s scrap and what’s valuable. Sometimes, we get random office supplies like stress balls or desk organizers or whatever, and generally we either throw them out or swipe them to have at our workstations.

Well, today I was going through a box and I found some weeb stuff, like anime posters and stuff. There was a big Monster Hunter: World book, a book about sushi, one about Edward Snowden, just random stuff. Then I see a book with Lelouch from Code Geass with his hand on Suzaku’s chest, and at first I think it’s just an art book because the official Code Geass art is super homoerotic, but nope. Turns out, I found someone’s porn stash. And it’s all in mint condition (thank god).

So like, rationally, I should just throw it away, right? But then goblin brain just starts screaming at me, “You have to save the yaois!” It’s not even, like, if I just wanted that stuff I could buy it, but like, gay porn that I stole from work is like, that’s a fucking magic item. It’s like, the story, the bragging rights, it’s just this impulse. Also I hate throwing stuff away especially when it’s like brand new, and the (sfw) Monster Hunter book looks like I could sell it for like, $80 or something if I could get it out. So for now I just put it in an inconspicuous box.

Should I do gay crime??? I would have to get it past security, but they’re mostly concerned about metal items. Should tell someone I found “some books” and see if I can get permission? Should I just forget about it because it’s dumb and irresponsible??? Help.

2 points

How many chances in your life do you get, to be able to tell the 6-word-story “I stole gay porn from work”?

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For sale: gay porn, never fapped.

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2 points

tragic

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it is always correct to steal gay porn from work :very-smart:

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