I was walking home from the bar one night, (yes it was dumb but I didn’t have a car and was too proud to ask for a ride. I walked everywhere all the time anyway.) About a third of the way home I realized someone was following me. Came to a fork in the road, one way leads me home in 2 blocks and the other way is a 24 hour coffee shop but that was more like 4 blocks and the road didn’t have street lights.
I decided to go home (this doesn’t really happen does it? It’ll be fine) and pick up my pace a little but now I hear footsteps behind me, and gaining, until he finally catches up to me and grabbed me from behind. “Keep your mouth shut and you won’t get hurt” I’ll never forget those words. Well having just come from the bar I still had a buzz kinda and I definitely wasn’t going anywhere with this guy, so I kinda twisted around and he punched me a couple times in the ribs. No lie I actually hit him with my purse and I did yell but no one came to their window or anything. He ran away the other way and I went home, I was right around the corner.
When I got to my 3rd floor apartment I was telling my roommates (my brother and my ex) what had happened and I had blood running all down my arm, I thought he punched me but he actually stabbed me 3 times with something thin and pointy. I get woozy when I see my own blood so after that I don’t remember too much. My brother grabbed a kitchen knife and took off looking for the guy, cops were called, cops came, cops said it was my ex. They literally didn’t believe me. I went to the hospital in an ambulance and stayed 3 nights I think, I had a collapsed lung in the left side and have a gnarly scar from the chest tube. They never caught him.
Not that interesting, but I was walking in the dark one night to get a glass of water. I made it down the stairs and turned towards the kitchen to step on something wet and slimy feeling. I touched it with my hand just to figure out my cat had decided to throw up there.
After a heavy night of drinking one weekend in high school I was spending the night at my friend’s house. The place wasn’t the cleanest, because, high schoolers. There was a bird that was kept in the bedroom and birds are pretty messy and throw food all over the place when they eat. There were clothes all over the floor so you couldn’t see the floor at all. When we walked in the room, the floor moved.
They left a blacklight on as a nightlight, turned on Ginuwine “My Pony” on loop and passed the fuck out. The room was kinda spinning from the amount that I had drank so if I closed my eyes I would get the spins. As I was looking up at the ceiling debating my life choices I saw something crawl across the wall. It.was.fucking.roaches.
I sat up in a bit of a panic and really started looking around the room and saw that roaches were crawling up the walls, over the bed and pillow, and my friend that was sleeping. I spent the night cross legged in an office chair with a can of roach spray that was in the corner of the room spraying a puddle of it around the chair as a barrier.
Found out later that because of them feeding the cats and just leaving wet cat food cans out around the house, sewer roaches would crawl up the bathtub drain in the middle of the night and pour out around the house.
Needless to say, my house is fucking CLEAN. And I might have slight ptsd with that fucking song and the feel of a bug crawling on me.
I was once so drunk that I ate a piece of pizza that fell cheese side down on a San Francisco sidewalk.