Devi
The American government was still paying out a civil war pension in 2020.
I’m a fosterer with quite a bit of dog training education. I second the advice that you need a good qualified behaviourist, this means degree level study or above.
However, for the meantime, nobody should be taking anything from him by force. This will worsen the behaviour. The things he’s taking don’t sound like they pose danger to him so take all the urgency out of the response. It’s anxiety driven so you want to make everything really chill.
Firstly, clear everything away, as much as possible get things in drawers or too high to reach. The less he can get that he shouldn’t the better.
Work on swapping with a low value item like a toy he doesn’t play with much, so say an old ball, give him the ball, get a treat and offer the treat while holding your hand for the ball. What should happen is he drops the ball, give him the treat, then hand the ball back. He’s learned that nothing bad happens here. He gets the treat AND the ball. Do this 5 times in a row, then leave the ball with him. He’s learned here that it’s all very chill and you’ve reduced his anxiety.
As he gets better at this, increase the challenge slowly, maybe a toy he likes a bit better, then better again. At this point you can also start swapping items, so you take a teddy, give him a treat, then give him a ball. If this makes him anxious then slow down, you want it to be really chill for him.
Eventually he’ll start giving you stuff just to see what he can get. It’s a fun game.
Another exercise you can try if he does get something you don’t want him to have is to throw treats away. If he has something you can throw a treat in one place, then another, then another, while he’s having a great time, quietly remove whatever he had, he’ll probably have forgotten he had it, but make sure it’s quickly hidden to help, give him loads of fuss when it’s gone for extra memory wiping!
Also make sure he is getting enough exercise and attention, and he’s not in pain, these kinds of problems usually start if a dog is feeling crappy for whatever reason.
I’m going to say something different from most, this guy might be genuine, he might just be some kid thats a bit lost. He might be a scammer but we haven’t heard proof of that yet.
HOWEVER, you can not move a stranger, however lovely, in with your teenage son. That’s just not a thing. If he wants to come live with you, AND he can get there by himself, then why can’t he live on the sofa? You also mention your siblings being supportive, why can’t he share with them? Are they younger than you?
Could he even move there legally? Would there be immigration issues if he tried?
See if you can read the messages yourself between the two of them, try to work out who’s suggesting these things. Is he talking about lack of money a lot? Is he constantly having ‘situations’ that your mom needs to fix?
Upvotes don’t do anything for personal points. Boost gives plus points, downvotes give negative points. If I like a post I upvote and boost it.
Lot’s of comments about dominance. This is an old erronous theory about dog behaviour based on a botched study. Dogs hump for many reasons, sexual is the obvious one, but also being nervous or poorly socialised.
What you should do is stop the behaviour, move your dog or theirs away and tell the owner to come get their dog.
If it happens in certain scenarios you can also stop it before the behaviour, so a common scenario is two dogs are playing, one dog gets overstimulated and then jumps on to hump, in that scenario you’d want to watch for earlier signs of overstimulation, wanting to stop, panting heavily, whale eyes, and stopping the play at that point.
Not all, but most don’t seem to have adventures. When I was a kid I’d go off into the woods and build a den or climb a tree, we once spent a whole week trying to dam a stream, god knows why. None of my friends kids go anywhere by themselves, a lot of them do ‘forest school’ where they’ll be taken by adults to a sanitised woodland and taught how to build a teepee with pre cut wood, and it’s just not the same thing.
Not a scientific observation, but the zoo I used to work at often planted medicinal plants in primate enclosures because they use them. I think this has been common in zoos for a long while.
This is a really patronising take.
Imagine if your country was ‘donated’ to a whole other group of people, they took over, murdered people, took your home, tortured your grandparents, you’re going to be mad. It’s not ‘childish’, it’s reality.
I’m not in the US but what makes you feel this is run down?