(no banana)

damn I wonder what would have happened if I baked a pie with that dough

I made a pie dough last week and forgot about the leftover dough in the fridge. Went to throw it out today because it was moldy but the mold looked and smelled exactly like gorgonzola, meaning I accidentally made a a pie-based blue cheese replacement somehow

also I got a job today and it’s finally at a decent restaurant with ok wages after getting offered the wage equivalent of dog water gruel several places. “oh but we’re like a family and it’s so fun to be he-” shut ! and give me money! dummbasses!

bro look at my capitalist attack dogs, they don’t even know what commerce is anymore

how will they maintain my beautiful fourth reich without even a basic understanding of material reality

Libuary 6th gets hijacked by Azovites, turns into Euromaidan 2.0, the Dems declares Zelensky President of the Ukrainian-American Commonwealth, Trump goes into exile in Donbas and becomes a hardcore Duginist, hires Haz as his grand vizier.

“Good job President 47, now head to the exfiltration point.”

why does the tractor have boss music?

They have been hitting him with the heart-attack gun continuously since he started running for President, but because his heart is constantly failing on its own, all the gun is doing is restarting it.

The A stands for

Israeli Tom Cruise rappelling down from the ceiling of the Cum Vault to retrieve the American sperm before it’s discovered and potentially corrupting the sacred gene pool.