agent_flounder
In my 50s. I’ve never been in a fight. I’ve gotten into confrontations a few times.
First was a guy on an off road trail. I was leading a group and one of em broke down and blocked the trail. Some cranky, leathery old fuck was being a dick about us being in the way. It had already been a stressful moment in a stressful day in a stressful week and I was fucking done and lost it. Couple of the guys had to keep me from getting in his face. I very, very rarely lose control. I wished I hadn’t and In retrospect I can totally see his point. But also he could have been less of a dick about it. And I should have been the mature guy and ignored his gnarled ass. I was 30 something.
Some shitheads were in a car honking, yelling at, and harassing my wife who was trying to park while I was across the street on the sidewalk. I was really pissed and repeatedly yelled at them to gtfo (more or less) until they finally left. I suppose they could’ve had a gun and shot me and that would’ve been a suboptimal outcome… And my wife can take care of herself. So mild regret on that one.
That’s the only times that jump to mind where I actually got really angry. There may have been times I am forgetting where someone was pissed at me or something and I de-escalated instead of escalating.
I would be more careful now. Why? It’s too big of a risk. I spent a lot of time playing out various scenarios and thinking about confrontations when I decided to carry a concealed firearm. It’s a huge responsibility and cannot be taken lightly. I felt morally and ethically obligated to avoid conflict, let alone escalation, at all costs. (ETA: The obvious exception is a case of legitimate self defense where someone intends to harm me or mine)
I no longer carry but it was extremely valuable to spend the time contemplating confrontations and potential outcomes. Even though I’ve never been a hothead (like my dad was) or thought I was some badass, I still realized I should be more careful.
Two major confrontations and zero fights in all these years isn’t too bad but I could’ve handled both better.
I hope to do better going forward.
Yay
Now what was I going to make …last Tuesday?
I’m in the process of reading this (and a dozen other books lol). Interesting so far. Haven’t formed opinions yet. But definitely appreciate Bell Hooks bell hooks for having tackled this subject.
