kani

I’ve gotten into a habit of “I’ll do it right now so I don’t have time to become anxious” and so I’ve gotten better about making calls now.

I am managing and kind of not managing really. Recently quit smoking and vaping and went off coffee so my brain has been a bit frazzled. But it’s getting back to normal.

Biggest help is working longer hours but fewer days and having my shift segmented so that I get downtime between busy hours. I do three days a week and on a workday don’t pressure myself to do any housework. On my days off I’ll catch up on sleep and housework.

I also have a diagnosis for autism so to me it seems like I can manage some symptoms of my ADHD easier thanks to ASD. But I also then seek a simple life and don’t do anything much besides work and looking after my dog and my partner. I’ll go out when I’m on holiday.

No use crying over spilt (choccy) milk

We have our arguments as well but we’ve gotten a lot better at arguing, now we can sort of pull back and express how we feel about the issue, not that the other person must be wrong for disagreeing.

And you’re right, I would’ve had a lot bigger dent on that confidence before and now instead of wallowing in it for ages I’ve grown angry cause I know I’ve not been treated right.

I’ve slowly built up confidence working with people and being more social and felt like my feelings and opinions were respected, but then had them outright ignored. I don’t know if I’m still bitter thinking that a coworker I thought of as a friend is less so a friend but at the same time it’s given me a push to apply for jobs higher up in my career since I don’t need to feel like I’m leaving my friends behind. I’ve been thinking I need another year before I’d feel confident enough to train to be a nurse rather than a carer but I might just find out if I can start sooner.

I’ve got the same issue but with all black socks

You’ve seen right through me with this comment. So many clothes I feel awkward in and yet I know I’ll need them when I’ll struggle to do the laundry. And some clothes I feel like I could improve by removing that ruffle of the neckline or shortening the hemline.

And of course the sewing machine needs adjusting so one doesn’t simply start sewing…

Occasionally I admit defeat and have to throw out projects that just aren’t getting finished. And tell myself not to even start some, just give it away to someone who might like it as it is, and I think being able to control that impulse and admit my shortcomings is something.

Less inventory definitely makes life easier, sharing a house or a flat meant I could only have my projects in one room, now they’re sprawling a bit again. I think I need to take my partner’s annoyance to heart and limit my project space to one corner.

Hmm, struggling to think of the biggest positive at the moment since I’m feeling quite low. I guess the connection I have with my autistic partner feels so much more rewarding when I get misunderstood so often.

The worst part for me has to do with the combination of rejection sensitivity, the anxiety it causes and how it’s given me low confidence that I’m trying to build up. After feeling confident for quite awhile I’ve had a bit of dent on it and now it feels so much harder to get up again.

Love a bit of blue cheese, pineapple and ham on my pizza (and not that uncommon in Finland), but I have actually had it with shrimp added and that was quite nice.

Half the plants I’ve grown seem to always catch some sort of a bug that I feel like wasn’t my fault, but I usually say a plant has survived despite my loving care.

I’ve grown some scotch bonnets, coriander and a few fruit trees from a seed but not with very much success. My lime tree was rescued by my sister, the mango by my step-mom.

The only one I’ve managed to not kill is the dragon tree I have but apparently they purify the air a bit.