No word of a lie:

Jeremy Clarkson has secured the title of the UK’s sexiest man for the second consecutive year.

The 64-year-old presenter surpassed notable contenders such as Prince William, Idris Elba, and Cillian Murphy in the annual poll conducted by IllicitEncounters, that brands itself “the best online dating site for married people”.

The Clarkson’s Farm star achieved an impressive score of nine out of 10 points in the survey.

Meanwhile, Spider-Man actor Tom Holland secured the second spot in the UK’s sexiest man list, which coincides with his return to the West End.

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Going to pretend to be Sigmund Freud for a minute and try make sense of this:

in the annual poll conducted by IllicitEncounters, that brands itself “the best online dating site for married people”.

Okay that makes sense, Clarkson’s considered the sexiest man among middle aged adulterers that still use these niche sites. He’s rich, powerful (or gives off that impression) and older.

Meanwhile, Spider-Man actor Tom Holland secured the second spot in the UK’s sexiest man list, which coincides with his return to the West End.

Also makes sense, middle aged adulterers looking to relive their “glory days” and get with someone that looks much younger. The opposite of Clarkson.

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17 points

Freudist level of explanatory power there alright.

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9 points

parenti quote but adjusted for middle aged adulterers

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okmatewanker

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No foul language - i.e. French 🤮

Obviously satire, dozy wankers

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