you sound like Dane Cook after an hour of…well…being Dane Cook.

you can’t gatekeep humor. I can’t fucking stand pretentious self-centered pricks like yourself.

humor isn’t here for YOU, it’s not here for ME. humor is here for them, the people who need it most. the ones who hate the day, you, themselves. the ones consuming the humor, even the ones telling the humor. IMO you’re a humorless prick, and that’s the only reason why your probably so insufferable be around.

I’m going to give you the best advice you’ll ever hear, so listen up.

if you don’t like the jokes I’m tellin, then get the fuck out! you paid nothing to be here. your tickets were free, as in feel free to fuckin leave.

– some comedian