i feel you, but i keep living just in case this ever changes. getting a job is unironically one of the best things i did for my mental health. helps paying for my hobbies too, still not enough to move out though. my solution is to endure and wait until i can sustain living on my own.
it’s hard, i lie in bed every evening unable to sleep thinking about how everything’s rigged against me. seeing no reason to live is perfectly rational.
but i don’t want to end up in a statistic no one’s going to do anything about. that’s not what i do. i have a few things that distract me from the thoughts, but it’s a constant flow of reasons why i don’t want to live here anymore.
Depression is one hell of a mental illness. unfortunately, the cure is normal living conditions. and that’s not happening anytime soon.
hang in there, and maybe you can look back on your life and say “i’m glad i stayed”.
That’d be awesome. I wish I had willpower to actually change some things in my life