I was having difficulty understanding my Chinese boss one day, and after the third time I asked in total confusion, “What?” He looked at me and asked, “Why you not understand me, am I no speaking English?” I cracked us both up with my reply of, “No, you’re clearly speaking Chinglish!”
Her: I am struggling with two words.
Me: Ok.
Her: Fuck and fuck.
Me: umm
Her: the first one is like a thing for eating a meal.
Me: Oh! Ok “fork” is what you eat with and “fuck” is what you do in private or yell when something goes wrong.
Her: Say it again.
(Multiple minutes later of me saying fork and fuck)
Her: So I eat with a for-K and f-U-ck in private.
Me: You got it, now go and fork yourself.
(Me getting hit with a pillow multiple times while laughing)
I have this sort of thing all the time here in Spain, though with shit/sheet.
There’s plenty going the other way too, of course. At least I don’t mistake miedo and mierda these days …
One time I misremembered my Japanese teacher’s mnemonic and wrote that my grandpa was married to noodles.
Teacher told us grandma is sofu because she has a sore foot from kicking grandpa’s ass. I remembered it as sore bum instead, and changed grandma to soba
