Meanwhile, the sidebar:

A place to share and discuss stories from The Onion, Clickhole, and other satire.

This article is part of a discussion about an article from The Onion. I think it is on topic for a community that discusses satirical articles and does not violate rules from the sidebar. If you’re a mod, feel free to remove this. If you’re not a mod, feel free to report, but please don’t derail discussion.