Capitalism and its consequences have been a disaster for the human anus

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145 points

Just use a lot of it I guess. It’s just gonna cost them more in the long run.

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34 points

Except when it’s that thin and crappy, some of it’s going to break off no matter how much you use.

You can use a lot of it to make the company spend more money refilling, sure, but you can’t do a decent wipe with that crap, pun intended, no matter what you do with it.

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29 points

Just absolutely demolish the toilet every time you use it.

Make them suck out that half-a-ply-ass-TP with oil rig equipment.

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11 points

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7 points
*

Flush a bundle of tampons wrapped in floss.

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11 points

Gotta do the star fold with the thin stuff, get the grain aligned like plywood to keep it from splitting.

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9 points
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You mean like some sort of asshole origami? Assigami?

I don’t think I’ve ever wiped my ass with a star. Other than that weird weekend with Ryan Seacrest, of course.

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7 points

As a person with bidet at home, I actually carry my own paper when I poo in public places.

I do know that makes me insane.

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2 points

The stuff at my job is actually okay but I do keep an emergency roll in my backpack.

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1 point

I’m mostly at home, but the stuff at my work is what you’d put in boxes with gifts for holidays lawl

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0 points
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I don’t see why it makes any difference whether it’s two-ply coiled 50 times around the roll, or one-ply coiled 100 times around the roll.

I actually prefer a handful of one ply. It’s soft and there are more gaps between the plys which makes your handful puffier. You just have to take a longer piece. If that extra effort results in people conserving over time: great.

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