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19 points

I don’t think chickens raised for meat live anywhere near 2 years. Yeah, a quick google shows around a 2 month harvest time for chickens raised for meat. That’s a big part of why chickens are such amazing creatures and make such an affordable protein source, they can be sustainably* harvested year round. (Sustainably as in without decreasing the size of your flock.)

Laying hens are productive for two to three years. They rarely make it into the human food supply though, after that long the texture and flavor of the meat changes and American consumers don’t prefer it. You can probably get them through a local butcher shop, though they might have to order it for you.

In a small and well managed flock, chickens can live 6 to 8 years. In the wild, I don’t think modern chickens would exist at all. Ask anyone who’s kept chickens, keeping the hawks and foxes and raccoons etc. out of them is a constant and eternal struggle.

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9 points
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Laying hens also are productive way beyond their ancestors with 10-20 eggs, which takes a big toll on their bones. According to a study from the university of Kassel an estimated 23-69% per flock come to the slaughtering line with broken keelbones, wings and legs from egg calcium depletion, rough handling and crammed cages.

Egg factory farming is an all around brutal and despicable industry. Look up what forced molting and maceration means and get your own chickens if you’re able or eat scrambled tofu.

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2 points

The chickens you would be able to get would be the same chickens used in farming, with all the health issues you mentioned.

And yes tofu scramble is amazing

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6 points

Ask anyone who’s kept chickens, keeping the hawks and foxes and raccoons etc. out of them is a constant and eternal struggle.

Two things I have learned as a chicken weirdo:

1.) Get dark colored chickens

2.) Get a big mean rooster.

I haven’t lost a chicken so far, but I have seen my bigass stupidly brave rooster take on all comers, he has defeated squirrels, snakes, frogs, mice, and a gopher that was apparently pretty bad at making connections. I’ve watched him chase off a cat and a pretty good sized dog. Foghorn Leghorn is more accurate than I realized.

But more than his incredible dinosaur kung-fu is that he is smart, and communicates with his hens. He will tell them to shelter in the coop, and they will run and hide. A hawk isn’t going to want to deal with 15 pounds of land-bird standing in a small doorway.

For the color, a black or gray chicken will be harder to see against the ground than a white one. Also, I think they look cooler than plain white chickens.

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4 points
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without decreasing the size of your flock.

Read that as “without decreasing the size of your cock”

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2 points

Surprisingly relevant lol

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2 points

Ideal period is 7 weeks. Anything below that is not meaty enough, anything above is too old and stringy meat.

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