Hey, I have a moral question.

If my boyfriend (25yo) shows me a photo of him as a kid, and asks me “Was I cute?” What is the appropriate response?

Of course my boyfriend is so cute, but saying that him as a kid was cute is inappropriate? Just because he was like 12yo in that picture?

Where is the line here? I usually refuse to have opinions on kids appearances because usually I have none, and I don’t know if saying that a kid looks “cute” is creepy.

51 points

Absolutely fine to say your partner was a cute kid. Nothing creepy at all.

Saying something like “Got any nudes of you at that age?” Now that would be fucking creepy.

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49 points

Cuteness has nothing to do with sexual attraction. Loads of things are cute. Kittens, puppies, red pandas, baby ducks are some examples of cute things. Basically anything that makes you go “aww” is cute.

If he was asking if you thought he was hot as a kid, that would be weird and you would be right to feel like that is inappropriate.

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5 points

Right, so…we’re not supposed to trying to seduce trash pandas or baby ducks?

Just want to make sure before I do something I might regret.

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47 points

You are so paranoid, saying a kid looks cute is not tantamount to wanting to sexually abuse them

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-9 points

I agree with your point, but the tone of your post strikes me as inappropriate for this particular community

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7 points

Sorry. How would you have me amend it?

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6 points

No need to worry. There is nothing creepy about saying a kid is cute.

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4 points

Oh, no worries at all! Your post doesn’t strike me as malicious at all. Just seems like we should be especially concerned with making the OPs feel “stupid” here :)

So it seems like you have 2 main points in your post (1 OP is overly worried, 2 sexual abuse is the real concern), so keeping both but with a more neutral tone:

You should not be worried about saying that a kid looks cute. The real concern that you’re hinting at with behavior toward children is anything that connotes sexual abuse, and the comment “that is a cute kid” is very different from that.

Or you could go for a positive tone:

You have nothing to worry about! Saying a kid looks cute is very different from sexualizing them.

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26 points

Basically any response that doesn’t include your desire to have birthed them, molest them, or eat them, should be fine.

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5 points

Also don’t ask them for a copy

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6 points
*

Even this isn’t weird, though. I had an ex who wanted one of my childhood pictures–she had it in a little locket.

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22 points

If someone says a kitten is cute, do you assume it means they’re sexually attracted to it?

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