Though OnlyFans currently bans the use of AI, there are plenty of startups like Daniel’s that are developing the technology to replace flesh-and-blood chatters altogether. (Some claim they’re already routing around OnlyFans’ prohibition by having a lone human press Send on thousands of AI-generated messages.)
The most surreal moment came as I noticed the faint sounds of my daughter and her puppy watching Bluey together down the hall, right as a subscriber was waxing poetic about how much he wanted to eat a macaron from between my ass cheeks; the juxtaposition made me question the entire course of my life.
AI chatbots will never be able to give us this kind of self reflection.
But despite that mistake and a few other hiccups—my punctuation seemed unnatural because it was too accurate—Daniel offered me the job.
“Baby, I like talking to you and all…but I notice that you’re using unspaced em-dashes as the alternate form for parenthetical phrases. No other girl I’ve ever met on OnlyFans has done that.”
Oh shit.
The agency’s manager sent me a background memo about the woman I’d be playing, a purported 21-year-old university student blessed with physical proportions that are in vogue these days. To ensure that my performance was as authentic as possible, I spent two hours committing all of her details to memory: her favorite programming language
You want to avoid those awkward, immersion-breaking moments in the chat where you’ve got some snippets of code in language that the client happens to know and you don’t, I imagine. The real pro route is to choose something adequately-esoteric that nobody is likely gonna call you out on it.
“When it’s late at night, sometimes I like to relax with a little coding in REXX, though Prolog is good to mix things up.”
I was to be paid 7 cents per line of dialog, with each dialog running for a minimum of 40 lines. For my first assignment, I had to compose 20 dialogs involving sex in public places—10 at the beach, five inside a car, and five in a forest or garden. There was a list of particular sex acts I had to include, as well as a stricture that I refrain from using emoji in more than 30 percent of lines. I had only 48 hours to complete the task.
Yeah, I can see why they want to get AI chatbots working for this.
Robert Carey, a Phoenix-based partner at the law firm Hagens Berman, which specializes in massive class actions, has a less charitable view of the matter. In the midst of my plunge into the chatting industry, I caught wind that he was looking for men to become plaintiffs in a class action against both OnlyFans and the agencies who hire chatters. A lead attorney in the lawsuits that revolutionized college sports by making it possible for student-athletes to get paid for name and image rights, Carey argues that the managers who run creators’ accounts are engaging in a type of bait and switch that fits the classic definition of fraud. “When you subscribe, the very first thing it says is, ‘Have a DM relationship,’” he said. “Well, that’s totally fraudulent … It’s an open secret they’re just defrauding people.”
Carey, who confided in me that his firm plans to file its lawsuit soon, contends that the chatting illusion can lead to serious harm for unwitting subscribers.
Hmm. I wonder how that works. Do they, in the discovery phase of this lawsuit, just require all of the service’s chat logs to be handed over?
For my first assignment, I had to compose 20 dialogs involving sex in public places—10 at the beach, five inside a car, and five in a forest or garden. There was a list of particular sex acts I had to include, as well as a stricture that I refrain from using emoji in more than 30 percent of lines. I had only 48 hours to complete the task.
Man, the latest season of Taskmaster is crazy.
Rexx and Prolog, hot damn. Main thing though is to not date Java programmers. They will treat you like an object. :)
Wait, you mean to tell me that the beautiful woman that you are talking to online could actually be a marketing team that is creating the idealized image of said woman designed specifically as a commercial product, like some kind of movie about a plastic doll, Barbie, now available on Blu-ray and select streaming services?
Who would do such a thing?
Of course I am.
Would esteemed Academy Award nominated character actress and producer Margot Robbie ever lie to you on the Internet?
Hello Academy Award winning character actress Margot Robbie.
Have you forgotten that you were not only nominated, but also won in the past?
Even in 80s movies there were parodies in this. Grannies sitting in a call center, knitting while answering phones with “Hello, I’m Bambi. My cup size is …”
The agency’s manager sent me a background memo about the woman I’d be playing, a purported 21-year-old university student blessed with physical proportions that are in vogue these days.
In vogue these days? That just reminds me of how every generation thinks they invented sex. Or the Simpsons quote where Mr. Burns describes a past encounter: “We expressed our love physically, as was the style at the time.”
Some body types are more…fashionable than others. For example, a woman who is deemed “chubby” now would’ve been a perfect 10 centuries ago.
Since beauty is subjective, tastes will be different from person to person, but certain types will dominate depending upon the culture at that time and place.
You don’t have to go that far - if you look at 90’s female models, or actresses that were considered “hot” at the time, they had a significantly different body type from today. They were a lot skinnier, there was more diet and less gym involved in the female bodies of the 90s and early 2000s.
Are we talking about high fashion models doing runways and magazine shoots for glossy fashion magazines, or are we talking about porn?
The bodies that you’re talking about weren’t exactly featured in the leading porn magazines or studio films, or even lad mags like Maxim/Stuff/FHM that didn’t do full nudity.
For porn, erotica, and other risqué content, there’s been significantly less shifts in trends and preferences.
Chubby 10 centuries ago? Mate, have you ever been to a museum? There were no chubby women apart from rich and obese aristocrats.
