233 points
*

I think Vance’s problem is that he has no defense for anyone’s claims. You can claim ANYTHING about Vance, true or not, and people are like, “Yeah, I see it.”

My mom had JD Vance as a student in Ohio. He kept 3 of his pet frogs in his underwear during the day and no one knew why.

See?

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118 points

yea, i see it

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35 points

did you enjoy the visualization?

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51 points

no

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60 points

AP can’t prove he didn’t keep pet frogs in his underwear.

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19 points

And they were unable to find the frogs for comment.

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16 points

They probably croaked at this point.

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8 points

Have they checked in the couch?

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56 points
*

His own party made racist jokes about his wife being Indian and this guy is like, “Yeah she’s not white.”

Wtf.

I would have taken any other answer, even the Will Smith slap. Jeez this fucking guy.

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35 points

I think Vance’s problem is he’s super weird

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14 points

Where’d he keep the rest of them?

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21 points

In the couch to keep them moist.

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0 points

You had to use the “m” word, huh? 😝

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12 points

I ate the onion on that statement, good on ya

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10 points

That makes total sense. I just hope he took them out when he had carnal relations with the settee.

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4 points

No, he wanted to be able to claim he’d been in “orgies”.

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9 points

How many pet frogs did he had?

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12 points

Normal amount.

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3 points

Well, enough to keep three in his underwear.

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7 points

I heard they were tadpoles but came out frogs. So they were in there for a while.

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6 points

I heard he liked the extra couch friction gained from the frog warts.

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6 points

Just look at the guy y’know

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4 points

In the underwear ? What ?

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4 points

Technically, ladies underwear, but I don’t judge.

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2 points

The real comments are in the comments

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1 point
Deleted by creator
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106 points
*

James David (formerly Duncan Donald) Vance requests that he be referred to as JD. Makes fun of woman requesting to be referred to as “she.”

That’s weird.

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40 points

Hey, have some respect - the female anatomy terrifies him so much that he can’t even stand to think about a period every time he looks at his own name.

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25 points

James Donald Bowman

Not Duncan but we dunkin on him

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15 points

Ya, I yanked Duncan outta my ass, thanks for the clarity!

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16 points

Your ass and a couch? That weird fucker will fuck anything!

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64 points

Well, so far there are already unsettling rumors about his sexual attraction towards couch cushions and dolphins… That is pretty weird

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13 points

The singed monkey nuts stuff was above board, tho’.

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12 points

Maybe he’s the one that was inviting Cawthorne to all those orgies.

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37 points

Lmao even Devin Nunes’ Cow got in on the trolling 😂

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33 points

Guy running for VP: “JD Vance may have sex with couches, dolphins, and even more disturbing things the electorate will learn about soon enough, but JD Vance will be damned if JD Vance ever uses the devil’s pronouns.”

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2 points

Something something burnt monkey testicles

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