14 points

Translation for those who haven’t been to our lovely zoo: the dolphins consented

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7 points

I didn’t understand. What is he accused of doing?

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9 points

https://www.snopes.com/news/2024/07/29/jd-vance-repost-screenshot-dolphin-porn/

Basically he was searching Twitter for “woman” “dolphin” and retweeted a video that said “woman gets violated by a dolphin and enjoys it”.

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10 points

There are some very nice futons in the aquarium exhibit.

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1 point

Ah, that makes sense. I’ve never been.

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3 points

Actually, those benches are kinda uncomfortable. Still a nice rest after you’ve been walking for a couple hours, but not suitable for anything else.

Source: grew up going to the Columbus Zoo

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4 points

This is new to me too. Maybe he saw a manatee and mistook it for his couch.

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46 points

“…does not currently hold…” doing Olympic gold levels of heavy lifting here.

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13 points

Also, somebody should check the rules.

Just guessing but “jerking off the dolphins” is not listed.

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2 points

Not listed yet.

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16 points

“As far as what he did to the couch in the lounge… well… that couch has been disposed of properly.”

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7 points

Columbus Zoo? What? Is this related to the 2 million stolen by employees or something else?

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4 points

Sectional relations with a dolphin, allegedly

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3 points

Is there anything with a leathery hide this guy won’t put his bits in?

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