I (fart) don’t (fart) fart. People say (fart) I fart but (fart) I don’t. I am not a flatulent person. (fart) They never (fart) report how much of a (fart) non-farter I am ( big long fart)

I want that 2 minutes back

I liked when he said he wasn’t weird while giving a rambling 2 hour press conference next to a breakfast sausage spoiling in the sun.

Hey Donnie, how’s the race going?

…

Jesus Christ :)

This story sounds like an Onion article. Matter of fact, a lot of stories about Trump are sounding like Onion articles…