I fucking hate tankies and so should you, these are the steps to wreck them in internet battle.

Step 1: Mention Star Trek. Tankies love this shit. It’s one of the only things that give them joy. They call it “communism in space”. Trust me, they go feral for this shit.

Step 2: Ask them if they like the original stuff. They should say yes, because it’s pre-9/11 Trek and that makes it valid.

Step 3: Put on some Jojo music because this is when they begin to lose.

Step 4: Tell them that the original Star Trek film was actually the first movie tie-in with McDonald’s Happy Meal. This is the ultimate sin because Mickey D’s and their “happy” meal is everything all factions of tankies hate. This would retcon Star Trek as unbased and capitalist cringe.

Step 5: The targeted tankie gets depressed that they can no longer have TTG play in the background in their life. They get so depressed, they stop bullying you online.

Step 6: This is how you stop tankies online

4 points
*
Deleted by creator
permalink
report
reply
10 points

a lot of this goes over my head, so i’m gathering the following:

  1. play giorno theme
  2. hexbear posters spontaneously combust when the piano bit hits
permalink
report
reply
6 points
*

Adjusting a big dial labeled “JoJo Theme Song” and looking behind me to gauge the approval of the audience.

permalink
report
reply
5 points

Dramatically putting my hand to my ear to ensure the audience knows I’m looking for their approval

permalink
report
parent
reply
17 points
*
Deleted by creator
permalink
report
reply

Pissing, shidding, farding and shaking right now

permalink
report
reply

Jokes on you tankie loser, the avian body only has so much hydration and you would have already used all of it for commie tears.

No piss for you because you CAN’T.

permalink
report
parent
reply

AAAAAAAAAAA! YOU CAN’T TAKE MY PISS AWAY IT’S ALL I HAVE!

permalink
report
parent
reply