59 points
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I feel like this falls under the “life” part of “life, liberty, and the pursuit of happiness”

Also, in a broader sense, “we can shit everywhere all we want and never clean up” is a criminally idiotic way to govern

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46 points

founding fathers didn’t explicitly say where to shit so our hands are tied

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28 points

But there is a line in the constitution mentioning the government’s duty to provide for the general welfare.

Not that any of this shit matters but still

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25 points

no more half measures walter

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That phrase is not in the constitution tho. It was a line from the DOI at the start of the revolution and isn’t actually binding to the current American federal government.

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13 points
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Deleted by creator
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9 points

it’s worth about as much as toilet paper since this has never meant anything during any part of US history.

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5 points

This is regarding the State itself not depriving people of life (e.g. by execution) except by due process, not a guarantee that life will be protected in any other sense for any other reason.

Obviously also bullshit given cops summarily executing people and having qualified immunity, etc., but if we’re being pedantic, we should go all the way.

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45 points

Biden is the more competent fascist we were warned about. Capital will get its way regardless of which major political party is running the country.

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there’s only been competent fascists and incompetent fascists for the last few decades at least, Trump was merely so incompetent that it temporarily broke the grand spell before the government used the Men in Black memory deletion thingy and everybody went “Awesome, back to brunch!” on January 20th, 2021

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Interesting. I continue not to give a shit about the constitution.

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34 points

The US is the only country I know of that fetishises it’s constitution to this extent. Most everywhere else it’s just an old document, but it seems like us lawmakers treat it like some demonic pact that has to be inscrutably followed

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16 points
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It’s also really weird how the highest court in the land is supposed to be dedicated to interpreting the constitution and extrapolating whether the founding fathers would have supported or opposed something fucking 250 years ago. Other countries rewrite parts of their constitutions all the time, but in burgerland George Washington is a deity that supposedly knew it all.

Also, America has the second oldest working constitution in the world which (only beaten by a microstate), which is kinda crazy for how young the country is

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6 points

It’s very Warhammer 40k by worshipping the document equivalent of a headstone for centuries.

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5 points

What’s even weirder is that the US Supreme Court was not even given that power by the constitution and just kinda gave it to itself in Marbury v Madison

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10 points

What’s the difference between a lawyer and a demon? Idk

Both make pacts and contracts. Both honor the verbiage of the contract to the letter over the intent. Both will cost you dearly. Both generally only show up uninvited or when something bad happens. Both take benefit from others’ misfortune.

I can’t tell the difference.

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10 points
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A demon fucks you, a lawyer fucks you. That’s the real difference I think

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2 points

And they love to cling to single amendments instead of the entire document, as it should be interpreted.

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Not everything in the universe is enumerated in the constitution you psychotic robot

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31 points

um, excuse me, i’ve been told it is the greatest document ever written and handed directly from god to george washington so get rekt leftists

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30 points

Excuse me sir but the constitution is like the bible part 2 but better

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We only ever hear how “the sacred texts” prohibit things when they would be tangibly good.

PATRIOT Act was ruled unconstitutional fucking forever ago, but you know.

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Oh absolutely. They do whatever they want and drag their feet over what they don’t want to do.

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12 points

They know that. The argument is purely opportunist.

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Novel way to teach children that the constitution ain’t shit.

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They threw it in the blender after

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From the beginning.

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