Yes. I once saw an episode of Maury where a man found out he wasn’t the genetic father of his 1 year old daughter, and he started crying and then punching the floor. Is that toxic masculinity or is that a person being sad?
No, punching signals anger. Anger doesn’t have to be dangerous - for instance punching a wall, or the floor. Emotions are normal, we don’t always deal with them in the most optimal manner, but I wouldn’t label someone beating up the floor because he just found out he was NOT the father as “dangerous”.
I’d be more forgiving that it’s a pretty extreme scenario most people won’t experience in their lives, but I do think we have a responsibility to handle our emotions in healthy ways. Punching shit is dangerous. You can hurt yourself, and even if not, it’s a signal to me that you are capable of causing harm because you can’t control your anger. I’m not sticking around to find out my body may be next.
Keep in mind, anger is often if not usually a secondary emotion to pain, fear, sadness, etc. Anger can be a great motivator, but again, how it’s expressed is important. Use your words, find some other action that doesn’t scare people (like take boxing classes where that’s the point), or process it on your own first.
See, if anything, this comment should be framed and labeled toxic masculinity.
In an effort to extend as much charity and empathy possible, what makes you say that? In my experience, it’s not a hard and fast rule, the people who exploit those emotions are just shitty people. I’ve definitely felt that people were using my own sadness or other emotional vulnerabilities against me, and I’ve felt the opposite - love and support getting through those emotions. I tossed out the people who used me, and kept the ones around who supported me.
Edit: hahah, kinda foot in mouth here, I just realized you’re the guy who posted about Medicare and jobs earlier, and I kinda mocked you here. Imma leave this post as it stands, because I think it’s a good conversation starter. I’ll try to do better moving forward!
