cross-posted from: https://mastodon.social/users/MrLovenstein/statuses/111862356629002380
Secret Panel HERE 🃏 https://tapas.io/episode/2357963
You do not play for fun. You do it to inflict pain.
Look, if you had lotus, fireball, mox, and channel in your opener you deserve to win that game
If you’re even known to own a Lotus nobody will even come near you. It’s been enough to keep me safely separated from the game for decades. It’s kind of like having a nuke in your sidecar.
Until a man is twenty-five, he still thinks, every so often, that under the right circumstances he could be the baddest motherfucker in the world. If I moved to a martial-arts monastery in China and studied real hard for ten years. If my family was wiped out by Colombian drug dealers and I swore myself to revenge. If I got a fatal disease, had one year to live, devoted it to wiping out street crime. If I just dropped out and devoted my life to being bad. Hiro used to feel that way, too, but then he ran into Raven. In a way, this is liberating. He no longer has to worry about trying to be the baddest motherfucker in the world. The position is taken.
I feel like if anyone in my playgroup ever got one we’d let them keep it in the deck until they get a real satisfying win from it, then either they take it out or everyone is allowed a proxy of it. Or possibly a ‘special occasion’ card like their birthday or if they’ve had a rough week and just need a win. I’ve also been known to keep some messed up cards in my side board in case someone joins our pod and they end up being an asshole, I can swap out and get them to pick up their ball and go home
I can dig it. If somebody is being an ass, I tend to bring out this one.
All your creatures are dead. Your dog is dead. Your cat is dead. Your mom is dead. Your friends are dead. The fleas in your underpants are dead. Everyone you ever knew is dead. You are dead. One million damage to you and everyone who looks like you.
Rocks. Fall.
Everyone. Dies.