65 points
*

4094 divided by 2 is 2047 male anscestors. The average volume of semen per ejaculation is roughly 3 mL on average.

2047 x 3 is 6141 mL of cum or 6.14 L of cum or about a gallon and a half.

The average fuel efficiency for cars in the US (sorry Europeans) is 25 mpg. This means if cum had the same energy density as gasoline you could travel roughly 37.5 miles on all the cum your male anscestors produced in the last 400 years.

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30 points
*

That’s only one ejaculation per male ancestor. You can safely assume that the average male ancestor ejaculated more than once. This would increase the distance traveled using the cum energy.

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24 points

True. But Im only factoring loads splurted resulting in reproductive success leading to you.

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12 points
*

I think it’s fair to include jizz blown into your 12 generations of grandmas prior to your conception, though, because that cum was necessary to eventually lead to you being born. Scientifically speaking I think we’re talking about all the man mayo that went into your grandma’s hoochie coochie prior to your conception, but excluding any baby batter that went into the making of your previous older sibling. So we’re only counting the clam sauce that led directly to you, not any of your siblings or any other combination of parents.

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7 points
*

According to Leitzmann et al 2004 the average number of male ejaculations in lifetime is approximately 8700 times. That would be 26,1 litres of cum per male.

Edit: 2047 male ancestors would have produced roughly 53 427 litres of cum. Do we have data on energy density of cum?

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2 points

What about cumflation?!

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1 point

He’s right, that would change everything

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11 points

L/theydidthemath

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2 points

l/foundthemobileuser teehee

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6 points

I just KNEW someone would do the math. Thank you for your contribution to humanity.

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4 points

This kind of insight is why I’m here. The next question is, “What is the energy density of jizz?”

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2 points

You think that’s all they produced?

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8 points
*

I dont have a degree in advanced theoretical cumonomics so I have to make some base assumptions.

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2 points

Yeah but the base assumption is that all those ancestors only ever came once.

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44 points

In Alabama you would need less than that though.

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26 points

With 12 generations, that would apply to pretty much everyone. It would be a statistical anomaly for anyone living today to have the full set of 4094 individual ancestors.

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42 points

I hate to break it to you but a lot of those are the same people.

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2 points

Are you saying that for the last 11 generations of most people’s family history, people were fucking their own offspring?

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1 point

I was gonna say “I went to high school in Alabama and the math just doesn’t work out that way”

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22 points

There’s gonna start being some overlap somewhere down the line

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7 points

ROLL TIDE!

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4 points

Sweet home Alabama.

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8 points

They just overlap much more recently

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10 points

Good to know there’s a long line of people already disappointed in me

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