I’m honestly hesitant to post this here, but… the absolute ludicrosity compels me. How? How does he have the gall to say something like that? He ought to burst into flames on the spot.

97 points

IDK, you could like, fucking, leave?

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25 points

At any time, even! Literally he could just tell his dudes to hit the bricks.

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60 points

Tutorial: How Putin can stop the tragedy of war in Ukraine

  1. Pull troops out of Ukraine.
  2. Jump out of highest window in Moscow.
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16 points

In that order.

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6 points

And pay reparations to Ukraine before jumping out of that window.

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5 points
*

2 Isn’t realistic

He’d never jump, it’d be an accidental fall with 2 gunshots in the back of his skull.

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56 points

Hmm, I wonder who can stop the war? Maybe the person who started it?

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20 points

But then he’d have to assassinate himself for saying he can’t win the war!

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13 points
*

Ya know what? I’d be okay with that. Be the first good thing he’s done in ages.

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5 points

So, just like a certain German dude?

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0 points

Assassinated by whom? Isn’t he the leader of Russia? or is there someone in the shadows always wanting war for Russia and if the president dont support war, he is then replaced by another Russian?

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42 points

I mean if this is his way of coping with his complete fuckup and preparing his people for the withdrawal, this might be a good thing. But I have to be a bit pessimistic that that is not where he’s going with this.

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27 points

Where he’s likely to be going with this is “war ends, but Russia gets to keep the territory they’ve illegally annexed”. And that will not do. They stole Crimea; if they get to steal more, then they’ll just be back again in a few years once they’ve licked their wounds. All territory must be returned to Ukraine, and then they can pay reparations and fuck off, and we’ll welcome Ukraine into the EU and NATO so this shit never happens again.

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4 points

Hear hear.

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2 points

Well that is the best of all worlds, I would settle for returning all Ukrainian citizens, leaving any Ukrainian land other than Crimea, and letting Ukraine join the EU & NATO.

There is real potential for Russia to lose Crimea at this point, and Ukraine hasn’t had control of it in almost a decade, so their citizen’s shouldn’t be there at this point. I know it sucks to say give up Crimea, but for the sake of ending this war, and preventing any future war (EU/NATO membership), I don’t think that is unreasonable at this point (of course, all matters are entirely up to Ukrainians, and anyone else has no right to make decisions regarding a concession - just my 2 cents, and I am plenty willing for my tax dollars to keep going to supporting Ukraine for as long as it takes).

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5 points

Giving up Crimea is like, an apex Conservative taking point for compromising and ending the war. It’s unacceptable, it was annexed illegally and it belongs to Ukraine and Ukraine alone.

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3 points
*

I think the opposition to the give up Crimea part is that Russia has to be demonstrated to demonstrably lose because of their actions. We need to prove that this empire building attitude is an attitude of ancient history and no longer works.

Rather like how Japan was made to give up territory in China at the end of the second world war.

If they are allowed to keep Crimea then there are some who will say that it’s worth the risk because sometimes you’re allowed to keep the territory.

I think Russia in general would be much more amenable to giving up Crimea if Putin wasn’t around anymore. It’s not really the world versus Russia it’s the world versus Putin, it’s not as if Russia has a democracy.

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4 points

I mean if this is his way of coping with his complete fuckup and preparing his people for the withdrawal, this might be a good thing

This. He signals that he wants a way out.

Of course, he’ll try to get or keep as much as possible, but saving face seems more important than victory. There’s hope.

Maybe we can all agree to say on Russia TV that glorius Russia won.

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32 points

‘We’re all just trying to figure out who did this.’

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