163 points

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67 points

I wish I had the patience to go and post this in reply to every tankie I’ve seen today defending the “honour” of this piece of shit in the name of Iranians who they’ve convinced themselves they can speak for (yet somehow never speak up for their best interests, only in defence of their “great leaders” interests, curious… 🤔🙄).

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20 points
*

Yeah, western tankies especially can be very weird. Meanwhile, the actual communist party of Iran has nothing good to say about him.

Quote:

The only regret of the people of Iran and the families of the survivors of the horrific crimes committed by the mercenaries of reaction and tyranny, over the death of Ebrahim Raisi, is that the opportunity for his historic trial in the not-too-distant future has been lost.

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7 points

western tankies especially can be very weird

Right, and they call anyone who disagrees with them, even actual communists, “McCarthyists” 🤦‍♀️🤦‍♀️

Seriously though, anyone who sees any reason whatsoever for communists to support the Iranian government mustn’t have a single fucking clue what communism is about… They’re a fucking joke (if only they didn’t go around giving leftists such a bad name)…

That’s a fantastic, and not at all surprising piece of information though, thanks for sharing!

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3 points

Damn, based.

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3 points
*

It should be noted that the Tudeh party has it’s HQ in Europe, hence them being all Bertie Big Bollocks about this news. They are banned in Iran.

The communists also helped overthrow the CIA puppet regime in the first place, which seems to have helped them not one jot.

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4 points

What’s a tankie? I keep seeing that term on Lemmy and nowhere else. I feel like I should know it by now.

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9 points

Tankies are people who claim to be communists, but who exclusively support authoritarians and their oppressive regimes, past and present, because these authoritarians call themselves communists (think believing Nazis were socialists because it was in their party name), even though their actions have nothing at all to do with communism, and fascists co-opting leftist language to gain power being a well documented phenomenon.

It’s pretty easy to tell really: if a project is/was stateless, classless, and moneyless - congratulations, it’s almost certainly communism, and those who support it are communists (or possibly one of several varieties of anarchist, like myself).

However if one or any of those conditions aren’t met, and/or there is a single dictator or a small group of cronies holding on to power claiming they’ve been met, but the reality is clearly different - congratulations, you basically have run of the mill fascism on your hands and those who support it are tankies (who, as I pointed out in OP, almost always speak up and in defence of a “dear leader” but never in defence of the people themselves, because all they care about is the regime, not the people living under it).

In the case of the fediverse, there are a couple of dedicated instances almost exclusively occupied by tankies, who have made it their goal to essentially troll and brigade anyone who doesn’t agree with their, frankly bizarre, views (calling it “dialectics” to make themselves feel better). They’re generally easy to avoid though, by blocking individuals, or their entire instance.

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1 point

To my understanding this means historically a western communist who supported the USSR’s interventions (with tanks, hence the name) in Eastern European countries (Hungary, Czechoslovakia, maybe also East Germany) when the Warsaw Pact was a thing. More broadly someone who thinks the Soviet Union was a good regime.

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1 point

From what I’ve been told, it originally was communist countries that use tanks against their people (like Tienanmen Square). It’s getting muddled by the countries that use tanks against their people, so I don’t know what it has become.

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1 point
*

I’m so glad I don’t really see them much anymore

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162 points

Alright, that one was pretty clever lmao

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-13 points
*

This is the one time the onion has done something even a remote shred of clever. To tie into the topic of the article, I once stoned to death my pet goldfish after he was showing signs of age and that was more clever than anything that the onion has done in their near-36 year span of creating misinformation, or anything the veterinary clinic could’ve told me to do otherwise.

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2 points

Hey man. It looks like you have some built up angst towards The Onion or towards this topic

It’s fine if you’re just letting some emotions out, but I just want to point out that the Onion is not trying to inform anyone. How can they spread misinformation if every article is clearly satire?

You may find it to be a terrible joke but I don’t get why this has caused you this much stress

Would you care to elaborate?

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2 points

You are aware that the onion is a satire piece and that they shouldn’t be taken serious?

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106 points

Let he who is without sin throw the first helicopter.

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19 points
Deleted by creator
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16 points

I remember the Taliban bitching that all the materiel (helicopters, humvees, etc) the US left behind at the airport had had grenades detonated in their engine compartments

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5 points

It’s really more of a buffer overflow situation at this point.

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85 points

Fucking legendary.

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58 points

I’ve found a lot of Onion headlines pretty mid and uninspired recently, but this one is aces. No notes.

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28 points

They’ve been going pretty hard lately, it’s great

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22 points

There was a change of ownership, they have just been bought by a few superfans. Since then the headlines are noticably stronger

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22 points

The new ownership group is Global Tetrahedron. According to their website, they were “born of the shadows, and are committed to control in all its forms.” They’ve also donated “300,000 guns to underprivileged communities”.

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18 points

My understanding is that the name itself is from older onion articles where when they needed an evil corporation name that is what they used. So they are indeed super fans.

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