Download the meetup app, find a group for one of your interests or hobbies and start attending. Might feel a bit overwhelming and you might not have lots of motivation to do it, but you gotta put yourself out there. good luck!

Do you have access to therapy? This sounds like depression and the best way forward is to talk to a doctor.

Yo, seriously you need to talk to a therapist to help you unpack all of that. You’re 20, you’ve got time to grow and mature. Definitely look into taking some classes at a community college, lots of folks your age there.

Get a hobby too … volunteer…

Good luck.

Also life changes a lot in the next few years. Like how you probably are significantly different than your 15 year old self.

As for the social thing…it’s always intimidating until you start trying…are you going to goof up, absolutely, but you learn and grow. Also young adults are not a horrible as middle schoolers or highschool. Self confidence will help lots with that, but it’s also a fake it until you make it thing too.

I found my improv class to be rather silly good fun, and everyone is nervous together.

You could take a part time job near more people like a restaurant or somewhere with staff near your age.

There are easy little classes like pottery or some shit you can just have a reason to be near people in a low-stress yet structured way.

Sign language class is also surprisingly fun, and and it could be helpful to other people later perhaps.

You could join a fitness club like running or biking or something. That will keep you fit and near other fit people. Healthy people have better sex.

Community theater is also filled with possible fun people to know. Generally it’s a fun creative crowd to be around, you don’t have to be on stage, although you should aim for that, and everyone is mostly outgoing and there to be silly and happy.

Go toward groups of people who are endeavoring to undertake some kind of task together. There will be music and girls eventually.

Hmmh. Maybe you need therapy. There is the possibility that it’s not just you being unsuccessful at making friends, but also some form of depression, burn-out or early mid-life crisis. That happens.

And when joining clubs… How do you do it? Do you go there and have fun? Or do you just go there as a means to meet people and frantically try to convince somebody to be your friend? Because lots of people actually go there to do the thing and not necessarily to get to know people. Obviously you’re going to be unsuccessful with those people and experience quite some let-downs. Also you’re going to miss part of the fun… On the other hand it’s the correct way to meet people as an adult. You just can’t force it. And you need to adjust your expectations.

And another word of advice: 20 isn’t that old. Sure most people have already been in romantic relationships at that age. But a considerable amount of people haven’t. For example, it took me a few years longer than that. But everything turned out alright. And we all experienced rejection. Or not matching with people. It happens over and over, and it’s part of the game.

Loneliness isn’t a nice feeling at all. But it’s also not the end of the world. Try to have some fun and don’t align your whole life along that one goal. See if there is more that defines you. But you may (and should) also pursue what you want. We all hope you get what you want from life. And with your negative feelings: Maybe try to get someone to listen to you. Maybe professional help. Just to check if you’re alright. There are some help-lines you can google and then call. Maybe do that if you feel like it. They have proper advise and can tell you how to get counseling or if you should visit a doctor. Especially once you lose interest in everything. That is not a good thing.