I am searching for a selfhosted and secure (end to end encryption) chat platform for my family (5-20 users), possibly one i can host on a raspi.

Is matrix a good choice, or should i try something else?

39 points

I’ve been using matrix for years to this purpose, but moving to xmpp/prosody now

permalink
report
reply
13 points

Can I ask why you’re switching?

permalink
report
parent
reply
31 points

No.

Yeah ok. First of all, because I can 😁. I mean z what’s good being an IT nerd if I can’t change stuff when I want?

Jokes aside, I’ve been reading more recently on matrix and looks like there are some security issues in the design of the app/protocol. I’m on mobile now, I’ll look for sources when I’m on pc. Also I don’t like that it is a server centric system (so data is primarily on the server instead of the clients). Also it takes more resources than I was expecting. For less than 10 users I can’t have less than 4gb of ram (on a dedicated debian server, running docker) or it swaps so much it kills the system.

So basically I’m testing out if xmpp is a better system for those issues.

permalink
report
parent
reply
1 point
*

Conversations being paid on the google play store is what’s stopping me from going xmpp… I can’t just say “message me via xmpp, you can use the Conversations app”. Now I’d have to explain what F-Droid is and why would they even get another app store and enable “unknown apps”. it’s not doable. I remember telling my mom to install Signal (before I got into self hosting) because I deleted whatsapp and she got angry like she worked for the zuck, saying “what do you mean you don’t use whatsapp” with an astonished face, started lecturing me on why I was destroying my social life… That just made me realize right now they probably wouldn’t download conversations either…welp I just wanted to share

permalink
report
parent
reply
6 points

What clients will you use for xmpp/prosody?

permalink
report
parent
reply
8 points

The easiest is to use the clients officially rebranded for Snikket, but there is a good overview on modern clients on https://joinjabber.org

permalink
report
parent
reply
4 points

Gajim on pc (I use arch btw - well endeavourOS because I can’t be bothered) and don’t remember what on android (there is the full list or clients and capabilities on xmpp.org)

permalink
report
parent
reply
5 points

How do you convince your family/friends to switch to a new app on their smartphone and use one just to talk with you/others in the crew?

@mcmodknower@programming.dev

permalink
report
parent
reply
5 points

Frienda no, but I do use whatsapp bridges so I can have all conversations in one place.

Family with extreme nagging, and because I’m the IT guy of the house so they kinda trust me/can’t be bothered to try and out-talk me.

permalink
report
parent
reply
1 point

WhatsApp bridge? How does it work?

permalink
report
parent
reply
2 points

My dad suggested me this after i told him about the new upload filters the eu is thinking about. Here is a link to a german blog post about it: https://netzpolitik.org/2024/anlasslose-massenueberwachung-frankreich-wackelt-in-der-ablehnung-der-chatkontrolle/#dokument

permalink
report
parent
reply

Any Reason Signal doesn’t do it?

Selfhosted isn’t always the Best option

permalink
report
reply
26 points
*

three main ones I’ve seen in this comment section are

• XMPP

• Matrix

• SimpleX

permalink
report
reply
3 points

So all of these encrypt the conversations so not even the server admin can access them?

permalink
report
parent
reply
19 points

XMPP only does it with certain client extensions. And Matrix only does it when the rooms are set up this way. SimpleX does what you want, but is kind of unintuitive for the average user.
I say go with Signal, it does what you want and is idiot-proof.

permalink
report
parent
reply
8 points

It is literally one setting in Matrix to force all rooms to only do encrypted messages.

Signal is pretty unintuitive when it comes to multiple devices per user, device transfers after a device has been lost,etc.

permalink
report
parent
reply
4 points

To be fair, pretty much all major XMPP clients have adopted OMEMO encryption, so doesn’t seem like much of an issue.

permalink
report
parent
reply
1 point

But it’s not self hostable.

permalink
report
parent
reply
0 points

no idea, I’ve just seen these in the comments

permalink
report
parent
reply
25 points
*

XMPP. It just works, requires very little resources, is stable and has decent clients.

I would go with Snikket instead of Prosody if I had been starting now.

Conversations on phones, Dino or Gajim on PCs, plus a conversejs install on the xmpp server, to allow web access when needed.

Conversations is easy for the family to figure out.

permalink
report
reply
14 points

This is what my family (and a few friends) use. We have been using it for a while now because it just works. Also, the kids have never complained about using Conversations, or about using it only for us (like if you have that one family member who won’t leave SMS behind - we’re that guy, I guess), and we can make as many channels as we need for the house, the kids, with each kid individually, for our MTG cards, with our couple of friends that use it, etc…

I don’t personally do the hosting, so I can’t speak to that. That’s the hubby’s thing
¯\_(ツ)_/¯

permalink
report
parent
reply
-8 points

XMPP if you are loving the 90’s

permalink
report
parent
reply
15 points

IP was invented in the '70s. Sometimes older protocols that work are just fine.

permalink
report
parent
reply
2 points

Same with email.

permalink
report
parent
reply
-4 points

Fine is a relative word

permalink
report
parent
reply
2 points

What’s your problem with xmpp?

permalink
report
parent
reply
-4 points

It is text only for the most part

permalink
report
parent
reply
24 points

https://snikket.org/ (xmpp based) is perfect for that. Matrix will work, but you will likely reach the limits of your Raspi with it fairly soon if you allow federation with other servers.

permalink
report
reply

Selfhosted

!selfhosted@lemmy.world

Create post

A place to share alternatives to popular online services that can be self-hosted without giving up privacy or locking you into a service you don’t control.

Rules:

  1. Be civil: we’re here to support and learn from one another. Insults won’t be tolerated. Flame wars are frowned upon.

  2. No spam posting.

  3. Posts have to be centered around self-hosting. There are other communities for discussing hardware or home computing. If it’s not obvious why your post topic revolves around selfhosting, please include details to make it clear.

  4. Don’t duplicate the full text of your blog or github here. Just post the link for folks to click.

  5. Submission headline should match the article title (don’t cherry-pick information from the title to fit your agenda).

  6. No trolling.

Resources:

Any issues on the community? Report it using the report flag.

Questions? DM the mods!

Community stats

  • 4.8K

    Monthly active users

  • 3.6K

    Posts

  • 81K

    Comments