280 points

Strange women lying in ponds distributing swords as a basis for a system of government.

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65 points

Strange woman here, anyone knows where I can buy swords in bulk, preferably with a pond thrown in? It’s for… a personal project.

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25 points

Are we to believe that famous actress Margot Robbie doesn’t have some sort of connection for bulk medieval weaponry?

I am shocked and dismayed.

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6 points

Have you tried your local Swords 'R Us? I hear there’s a July 4 blowout sale this week. Use promo code Pond50 for half of your pond!

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11 points

something something ‘watery tart’ something.

You know how to kill any party? Start quoting Monty Python.

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21 points

He’s being oppressed! Come see the violence inherent in the system!

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12 points

Who are you, who are so wise in the ways of science?

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11 points

You sound like a moistened bint to me. Care to decree some governmental officials while you’re here?

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6 points

What has Monty Python ever done for us?

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8 points
*

The woman = Amy Coney Barrett

The pond = DC swamp

The sword = Official acts

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179 points

Guillotines.

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46 points

That wasn’t really a thing in medieval times. I’m afraid an axe will have to do.

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30 points

Trebuchet?

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22 points

Of course! It’s the superior siege engine.

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5 points

Imagine using this for execution

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2 points

First used in ancient China around IV century BC.
We can get tripantium though, advanced evolution of it invented in XIII century France.

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5 points

It was an instrument used by the burghers in bringing about the end of European feudal lordship, replacing the feudal mode of production with the capitalist one.

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2 points

It’s okay, we’re getting rid of history lessons too!

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8 points

This might fit in mediaeval times, with the earliest possible recorded use in the 13th century, but it’s certainly not well-known until the early modern period and most famous right on the border between early and late modern.

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6 points

And the billionaires will be the first to try it out!

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3 points

It goes Yah

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3 points

Sic semper tyrranis

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1 point

y’all qaeda had those on Jan6. They can have 'em.

Samurai sword. But, probably they all have those as well.

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105 points

Having most of the year off for festivals and holy days

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35 points

Good news: take up subsistence farming, no healthcare, no electricity, and make everything yourself, and you too can have half the year “off”.

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54 points

Don’t threaten me with a good time

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33 points

I mean the reality was that the time “off” was spent farming their own land, taking care of animals, fixing the house and doing the insane number of household tasks that come with premodern living. Spend a few days just cooking in a medieval style, and you’ll quickly realize it’s a LOT of work.

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15 points

take up subsistence farming

Where?

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5 points

Plenty of places you can do this. Put “homesteading” into a search engine of your choice and you’ll get more information on the topic than you can handle.

You’ll also pretty quickly realize its a very hard, tedious life and we have it pretty good in many ways in the modern world.

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4 points
*

Gotta buy land first. Like 10 acers if you want to grow most of your own food.

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1 point

Japan sells rural land for cheap

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3 points

Is Alaska still giving away free land?

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5 points

No, but it’s like a dollar per square meter if you’re remote enough…

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3 points

So you think in order for people to not work their lives away we would have to take up subsistence farming? With all the tech and machines we have the only viable way to not be a company man is to give away all of the luxuries we currently have?

How’s that Kool aid tasting?

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1 point
*

That’s not remotely close to what I think the world SHOULD BE like.

It is, unfortunately, what I think the world IS like.

I’m also pointing out that if you want that aspect of the middle ages, you can have it right now by also taking all the crappy aspects of the middle ages…

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1 point

Depending on the state and one’s farming capabilities, some people could already be halfway there! At least part of the year

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88 points

My non-joke answer is apprenticeship. Kids could actually learn how to do a valuable job rather than graduating from high school with almost no useful skills.

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28 points

TIL that the US doesn’t have apprenticeships. We have them over here in Australia, for the usual trades. But we also regulate a lot of those things - we’re not allowed to handle our own electrical work if we’re not trade qualified.

How does it work in the US, if a kid wants to become, say, a plumber?

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21 points
2 points

I had no idea this existed. Thanks for the share!

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24 points

Thats not medieval, thats everywhere exept the US of A.

Where I live, apprenticeships are officially regulated and for many proffessions you are not allowed to open a business without proper qualification.

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15 points

The US has apprenticeships as well. Not sure why this person doesn’t think they do …

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3 points

Trump had an Apprentice

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-2 points

What kind of generalisation are you trying to point out?

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10 points

Don’t those already exist in union shops nowadays?

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8 points

Often, yes, there just aren’t enough union shops anymore.

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8 points

Wait, you don’t it in the US ? Kids who aren’t comfortable in school start learning a trade at 14, so by the time they’re 18 they have some skills.

I get that it’s a pitty that non everyone reads philosopher or learn about history and science, but on the other hands, some kids are really uncomortable at school, so having them working one week, and going to school one week is an alternative which pulls some student out of the failure cycle

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6 points

Education in general is quite shit in the US. Apprenticeships, contracts and unions are all things most Americans never experience.

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87 points
*

Our leaders fighting in the wars they start.

You wanted it… go fucking get it cowards.

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12 points

Imagine a king fighting his own battle, wouldn’t that be a sight…

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1 point

On Sep 7, 1944, a group of American pilots was tasked with bombing a radio tower at Chichijima Island in the Pacific theater. The Japanese resistance was strong, and many American planes were shot down. Eight pilots managed to parachute to the ground safely but were caught by the Japanese.

The Japanese military tortured them and then brutally executed them, in at least one case forcing the prisoner to dig his own grave before killing him. After the prisoners were executed, the Japanese cannibalized them, not due to lack of rations but to show “fighting spirit”.

A ninth pilot parachuted away that day. The Japanese sent small boats out to try to capture him, but American airplanes arrived to force the Japanese boats back. The pilot was swimming in the open ocean far from any nearby ships when an American submarine suddenly breached the water in front of him and rescued him.

That pilot then went on to become the 41st President of the United States.

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6 points

they should also sport appropriate codpieces to match their raging egos

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0 points

Hell yeah! Modern leaders are fucking cowards. Don’t start a war if you’re not going to fight in it yourself!

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1 point

Hey tbf at least here in the States these guys are reaching their 80s…

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