Since America is bringing back kings what other kind of stuff is on your medieval wishlist?

That’s not cool man…

They said medieval, that is way too late.

I dunno, that was invented to make beheadings more humane…let’s go back to an axe.

Strange women lying in ponds distributing swords as a basis for a system of government.

Strange woman here, anyone knows where I can buy swords in bulk, preferably with a pond thrown in? It’s for… a personal project.

Are we to believe that famous actress Margot Robbie doesn’t have some sort of connection for bulk medieval weaponry?

I am shocked and dismayed.

Have you tried your local Swords 'R Us? I hear there’s a July 4 blowout sale this week. Use promo code Pond50 for half of your pond!

something something ‘watery tart’ something.

You know how to kill any party? Start quoting Monty Python.

He’s being oppressed! Come see the violence inherent in the system!

Who are you, who are so wise in the ways of science?

You sound like a moistened bint to me. Care to decree some governmental officials while you’re here?

What has Monty Python ever done for us?

The woman = Amy Coney Barrett

The pond = DC swamp

The sword = Official acts

As somebody who lives in a kingdom, yes! Fucking parasites!

Thailand? Or the UK?

Netherlands. Thailand and Morocco are even worse I guess. There, you’ll get punished harshly for beinig openly anti-monarchy. I feel sorry for those countries.

That wasn’t really a thing in medieval times. I’m afraid an axe will have to do.

Of course! It’s the superior siege engine.

Imagine using this for execution

First used in ancient China around IV century BC.
We can get tripantium though, advanced evolution of it invented in XIII century France.

It’s okay, we’re getting rid of history lessons too!

It was an instrument used by the burghers in bringing about the end of European feudal lordship, replacing the feudal mode of production with the capitalist one.

This might fit in mediaeval times, with the earliest possible recorded use in the 13th century, but it’s certainly not well-known until the early modern period and most famous right on the border between early and late modern.

And the billionaires will be the first to try it out!

y’all qaeda had those on Jan6. They can have 'em.

Samurai sword. But, probably they all have those as well.

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Since America is bringing back kings what other kind of stuff is on your medieval wishlist?

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